Bart Simpson: Assistant Manager/Quotes
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- Bart: Whoa! Wrestle Madness X-Something! Homer, buy me a ticket a-s-a-p!
- Homer: Seventy-five bucks? No w-a-y!
- Bart: But it's Hagen the Horrible! Seeing him is my life's dream!
- Lisa: Way to dream big.
- Homer: If you wanna spend seventy-five bucks for nosebleed seats, go get a job, and pay for them yourself.
- Marge: Bart get a job? Hee-hee!
- Bart: What's so funny?
- Lisa: Even if could find one, you're not enough to work, legally.
- Apu: You are lucky I had that outfit in your size. it was for my cousin "Shorty," but he got held up by immigration.
- Bart: Um... they're kind of a snug fit.
- Apu: That is true. Polyester is a wonder fabric, but not very giving.
- Apu: Your first managerial task is to restock the hair spray. It goes right here next to the insecticides.
- Bart: Aren't you afraid people will get mixed up and grab the wrong can?
- Apu: Not to worry. Both have the exact same ingredients.
- Apu: Your next task is freezer inventory. You need to count all the milk, sodas, and ice cream.
- Bart: Sounds easy enough.
- Apu: And you need to rotate and restock the bottles. You will not be in the freezer for more than an hour.
- Bart: An hour?! I'll freeze to death in there!
- Apu: Do not worry. We have this old coat to wear when we work in the freezer.
- Bart: Well, okay... Are you sure this will keep me warm enough?
- Apu: That coat belonged to the old hobo who lived out back by the dumpster. It kept him warm for years before he died in it.
- Apu: Bart Simpson, you can use mummy dogs to bribe bullies, but you cannot give away half the store to some b-list celebrity!
- Bart: But...
- Apu: You are fired!
- Bart: [GULP!]
