'Twas the Eve Before Christmas/Quotes
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- Homer: [narrating] 'Twas the eve before Christmas, and all through our home, not a sound could be heard, 'cept a sax-o-mo-phone. The stockings were hung on the mantle downstairs, when Marge asked me...
- Marge: Have you seen Maggie somewhere?
- Marge: Homer, you must put the gifts by the tree!
- Homer: The presents! [narrating] I gasped, with a slap to my head, that gave me to know I had something to dread. I'd left them with Grampa, who gave me a hassle while meeting him at the Retirement Castle. Then we stopped off at Moe's, and the rest was a blur. Now my brain couldn't tell me where all the gifts were.
- Homer: [narrating] New presents I needed to find with great speed like, for Lisa, the phone book... 'cause she likes to read. Little Maggie won't mind if she gets the dog's bowl. And Bart, he deserves a big fat lump of coal. But Marge won't be easy to fool with this trick... Then it dawned on me... I could dress up as St. Nick!
- Homer: [narrating] I went to the boy's room to take him apart. I practiced my entrance... Why you little—Bart! But the sound wasn't the cat's nor was it the boy's. Some jerk on my roof was the cause of this noise.
- Homer: [narrating] So together we Simpsons sat down by the tree, and we basked in the love... of a brand new TV. And they heard me exclaim when I bid them good night... Merry Christmas to all and to all... shut that light!
