Lisa the Beauty Queen/Quotes
Pahusacheta: I am Pahusacheta.
[Her father, Sanjay, and her uncle, Apu are in the audience. They stand and applaud loudly.]
Apu: Judges, there is your queen!
Pahusacheta: For my talent act I will play MacArthur Park on drums.
Audience laughs.
Pahusacheta: No, I am serious!
Marge: Apu, who is looking after the Kwik-E-Mart while you two are here?
Apu: Uh oh!
[At the Kwik-E-Mart. Apu left it unguarded. Jimbo Jones and his gang are laughing as they wheel out the Slushie machine.]
(Homer challenges the "Guess Your Age and Weight" booth at the school carnival.)
Booth Operator: I'd say 53 and 420 pounds.
Homer: Ha ha, you lose! 36 and 239!
Homer: You're cute as a bug's ear.
Lisa: Fathers have to say that stuff!
Homer: Dad, am I cute as a bug's ear?
Grampa: No, you're homely as a mule's butt!
Homer: There, see?
Principal Skinner: But first, our second prize winner and the recipient of this handsome shoe buffer... Ned Flanders.
Ned: (gasps)
Homer: Oh it's no fair, we'll never have a buffer!
Marge: We have one at home, you never use it.
Homer: Well, I want that one!