Difference between revisions of "I Love Lisa/Quotes"
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| − | + | '''Ralph''': The doctor said I wouldn't have any nose bleeds if I kept my finger outta there! | |
| − | + | ---- | |
| − | + | '''Ralph''': I Choo-Choo-Choose you. | |
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''Moe''': (reads his valentine) "To Moe. From your secret admirer." | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Barney''': Yoo hoo!! | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Moe''': Oh God, no! | ||
| + | |||
| + | (Barney blows a kiss and belches) | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''Guy''': Where do you want these beef hearts? | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Lunchlady Doris''': On the floor. | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Guy''': It doesnt look very clean. | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Lunchlady Doris''': Just do your job, heart boy. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''Groundskeeper Willie''': I didn't cry when me own father was hung for stealing a pig, but I'll cry now. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''Lisa''': Ralph thinks I like him but I only gave him a valentine because I felt sorry for him. | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Homer''': Ah, sweet pity. Where would my love life have been without it? | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''Homer''': You know, one day honest citizens are going to stand up to you crooked cops. | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Chief Wiggum''': They are!? Oh no! Ha-have they set a date? | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''Ralph''': Uh... so... do you like..... stuff? | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''Ralph''': My parents won't let me use scissors. [kids laugh at him] | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Miss Hoover''': The children have a right to laugh at you, Ralph. These things couldn't cut butter. Now, take out your red crayons. | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Ralph''': Miss Hoover. I don't have a red crayon. | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Miss Hoover''': Why not? | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Ralph''': I ate it. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''Grampa''': Bah, this is just another Hallmark holiday cooked up to sell cards. | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Jasper''': Aww... a Valentine from my daughter! | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Grampa''': Can I have the envelope? | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''Miss Hoover''': You may now exchange Valentines. | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Ralph''': Miss Hoover, I glued my head to my shoulder. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''Ms. Hoover''': First, we're going to construct paper mailboxes to store the valentines. | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Lisa''': Isn't that just pointless busy-work? | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Ms. Hoover''': [taps her nose] Bull's-eye. Get cracking. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''Principal Skinner''': Attention everyone, this is Principal Skinner. Some student (possibly Bart Simpson) has been circulating candy hearts with crude off-color sentiments. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''Krusty''': Hey, kids! Don't forget to watch my 29th Anniversary Show, featuring clips like this one of Sideshow Mel wacked out on wowie-sauce! | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | [about Krusty's 29th Anniversary Show] | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Bart''': I'd give anything to go to that show! | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Homer''': I'd sell my first-born son! | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Bart''': Hey! | ||
| − | ''' | + | '''Homer''': You'll do as you're told! |
---- | ---- | ||
| − | '''Lisa:''' | + | '''Lisa''': What do you say to a boy to let him know you're not interested? |
| + | |||
| + | '''Marge''': Well, honey, when I... | ||
| + | '''Homer''': [puts up a hand] Let me handle this, Marge, I've heard 'em all. I like you as a friend... I think we should see other people... I no speak English... | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Lisa''': I get the idea. | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Homer''': I'm married to the sea... I don't want to kill you, but I will. | ||
---- | ---- | ||
| − | '''Ralph:''' | + | '''Homer''': Six simple words: I'm not gay, but I'll learn |
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''Lisa''' [when Ralph shows up at the Simpson house]: Just make up some excuse! [runs to hide] | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Homer''': [answering the door] She's in the can. Go away. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''Bart''': Oh it isn't fair. I'm ten times the Krusty fan you are. I even have the Krusty home pregnancy test! | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''Lisa''': I'm not sure if I should go. I don't even like him. | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Bart''': You're right, Lis, you shouldn't go. It wouldn't be honest. I'll go, disguised as you. | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Lisa''': What if he wants to hold hands? | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Bart''': I'm prepared to make that sacrifice. | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Lisa''': What if he wants a kiss? | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Bart''': I'm prepared to make that sacrifice. | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Lisa''': What if he… | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Bart''': You don't want to know how far I'll go. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''Lisa''': Dad, is it all right to take things from people you don't like? | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Homer''': Sure it is, honey. You do mean stealing, don't you? | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''Lisa''': That story isn't suitable for children. | ||
| + | |||
| + | '''Chief Wiggum''': Really? I keep my pants on in this version. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''Principal Skinner''': Good evening, everyone, and welcome to a wonderful evening of theater and picking up after yourselves. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''Miss Hoover''': Bart, do you want to play John Wilkes Booth, or do you want to act like a maniac? | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''Ralph''': Leave me alone. I'm here to play George Washington. | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''Bart''' [after Miss Hoover carries him offstage]: Unhand me, Yankee! | ||
| + | ---- | ||
| + | '''Ralph''': [reads Lisa's card] "Let's 'bee' friends." It says, "bee" and it has a picture of a bee on it. [laughs] | ||
| + | ---- | ||
{{Season 4 Q}} | {{Season 4 Q}} | ||
Revision as of 17:42, September 15, 2010
Ralph: The doctor said I wouldn't have any nose bleeds if I kept my finger outta there!
Ralph: I Choo-Choo-Choose you.
Moe: (reads his valentine) "To Moe. From your secret admirer."
Barney: Yoo hoo!!
Moe: Oh God, no!
(Barney blows a kiss and belches)
Guy: Where do you want these beef hearts?
Lunchlady Doris: On the floor.
Guy: It doesnt look very clean.
Lunchlady Doris: Just do your job, heart boy.
Groundskeeper Willie: I didn't cry when me own father was hung for stealing a pig, but I'll cry now.
Lisa: Ralph thinks I like him but I only gave him a valentine because I felt sorry for him.
Homer: Ah, sweet pity. Where would my love life have been without it?
Homer: You know, one day honest citizens are going to stand up to you crooked cops.
Chief Wiggum: They are!? Oh no! Ha-have they set a date?
Ralph: Uh... so... do you like..... stuff?
Ralph: My parents won't let me use scissors. [kids laugh at him]
Miss Hoover: The children have a right to laugh at you, Ralph. These things couldn't cut butter. Now, take out your red crayons.
Ralph: Miss Hoover. I don't have a red crayon.
Miss Hoover: Why not?
Ralph: I ate it.
Grampa: Bah, this is just another Hallmark holiday cooked up to sell cards.
Jasper: Aww... a Valentine from my daughter!
Grampa: Can I have the envelope?
Miss Hoover: You may now exchange Valentines.
Ralph: Miss Hoover, I glued my head to my shoulder.
Ms. Hoover: First, we're going to construct paper mailboxes to store the valentines.
Lisa: Isn't that just pointless busy-work?
Ms. Hoover: [taps her nose] Bull's-eye. Get cracking.
Principal Skinner: Attention everyone, this is Principal Skinner. Some student (possibly Bart Simpson) has been circulating candy hearts with crude off-color sentiments.
Krusty: Hey, kids! Don't forget to watch my 29th Anniversary Show, featuring clips like this one of Sideshow Mel wacked out on wowie-sauce!
[about Krusty's 29th Anniversary Show]
Bart: I'd give anything to go to that show!
Homer: I'd sell my first-born son!
Bart: Hey!
Homer: You'll do as you're told!
Lisa: What do you say to a boy to let him know you're not interested?
Marge: Well, honey, when I... Homer: [puts up a hand] Let me handle this, Marge, I've heard 'em all. I like you as a friend... I think we should see other people... I no speak English...
Lisa: I get the idea.
Homer: I'm married to the sea... I don't want to kill you, but I will.
Homer: Six simple words: I'm not gay, but I'll learn
Lisa [when Ralph shows up at the Simpson house]: Just make up some excuse! [runs to hide]
Homer: [answering the door] She's in the can. Go away.
Bart: Oh it isn't fair. I'm ten times the Krusty fan you are. I even have the Krusty home pregnancy test!
Lisa: I'm not sure if I should go. I don't even like him.
Bart: You're right, Lis, you shouldn't go. It wouldn't be honest. I'll go, disguised as you.
Lisa: What if he wants to hold hands?
Bart: I'm prepared to make that sacrifice.
Lisa: What if he wants a kiss?
Bart: I'm prepared to make that sacrifice.
Lisa: What if he…
Bart: You don't want to know how far I'll go.
Lisa: Dad, is it all right to take things from people you don't like?
Homer: Sure it is, honey. You do mean stealing, don't you?
Lisa: That story isn't suitable for children.
Chief Wiggum: Really? I keep my pants on in this version.
Principal Skinner: Good evening, everyone, and welcome to a wonderful evening of theater and picking up after yourselves.
Miss Hoover: Bart, do you want to play John Wilkes Booth, or do you want to act like a maniac?
Ralph: Leave me alone. I'm here to play George Washington.
Bart [after Miss Hoover carries him offstage]: Unhand me, Yankee!
Ralph: [reads Lisa's card] "Let's 'bee' friends." It says, "bee" and it has a picture of a bee on it. [laughs]
