Chalkboard gag
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The chalkboard gag is a running visual joke that occurs during the opening credits of many episodes of The Simpsons. In this gag, Bart Simpson is writing a unique phrase on the chalkboard repeatedly; when the school bell rings, he immediately stops writing and runs out of the classroom. The phrase is usually in the form of an admonishment, implying that Bart has been assigned this task as punishment in detention for some misbehavior left partly to the viewer's imagination.
Several of the gags have been show to be crimes in the U.S. (e.g. ""Bart Bucks" are not legal tender" (counterfeiting which is a class C felony))
The chalkboard gags are usually written in upper case (with the exception of the words "eBay," in which Bart wrote a lower case "e" and "ay", and "iPODDY," where the "i" is lower case.)
While running visual jokes in The Simpsons are rarely referred to by the content of the show itself, in the episode "Skinner's Sense of Snow", Bart says that he had written on the chalkboard so many times that his hands sound like a cement mixer. In another episode ("Marge vs. Singles, Seniors, Childless Couples and Teens, and Gays"), Bart asks for a detention but Ms. Krabappel said they all got tired of that years ago, referencing the reduced number of gags in the openings. In the episode "Bart the Murderer", Bart is inspired by Fat Tony and attempts to bribe his principal, Mr. Skinner. In the next scene, Bart is seen writing "I will not bribe Mr. Skinner" on the chalkboard, monitored by the principal himself.
Lisa has been punished with the chalkboard twice, once in the episode "Lisa's Date with Density". As she writes, she complains, "How does Bart do this every week?" The second time was in "Grift of the Magi." When Bart finds out, he malapropism, "The ironing is delicious."
In the early days of the series, a chalkboard gag was used in almost every episode, but, as commercial time has increased, they have gradually disappeared. They are now shown as rarely as twice per season. The show's producers have said that they may soon disappear altogether. However, they seem to be making a comeback as there were eight chalkboard gags during season 17 including three in a row during the last three episodes of the season. The 4th season, the 11th season and the 12th season are the only seasons to use chalkboard gags in each episode (excluding the Treehouse of Horrors).
A chalkboard gag was also used in The Simpsons Movie. Bart can be seen writing "I will not illegally download this movie." on the chalkboard at school. As a follow-up, the chalkboard gag on the Season 19 premiere episode, He Loves to Fly and He D'ohs, which immediately follows the Simpsons Movie, shows Bart writing, "I will not wait 20 years to make another movie."
Chalkboard gags outside The Simpsons
- A chalkboard gag appeared in the South Park episode "Cartoon Wars Part II", writing I Hate Family Guy.
- In the American children's books Captain Underpants and the Attack of the Talking Toilets, Mr. Krupp punishes George and Harold and makes them fill chalkboards with "I will never do anything which angers my handsome and charming principal, Mr. Krupp, ever, ever again." George and Harold get revenge when they are made Principals for a Day, and they punish the teachers (and tattletale Melvin Sneedly) to write the following sentences on chalkboards:
- Ms. Ribble: I will stop being such a crab.
- Mr. Meaner: I will chill out.
- Ms. Anthrope: I will get a life.
- Melvin: I will not be a tattle-tale.
- Mr. Krupp: I will be very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very nice to "George the Great" and "The Amazing Harold".
- In a different book, Captain Underpants and the Perilous Plight of the Purple Potty People, when George and Harold are making sure they are in the right universe, three kids are being seen writing various things about their childhood, such as
- Crying Girl: My parents only pretend to love me.
- Miserable Boy: I apologize for being born.
- Glasses Girl: I'm so ugly, when I was born, the doctor slapped my mom.
- In the comic strip series FoxTrot, Jason Fox gets punished with the chalkboard several times:
- In a 1994 Sunday strip, Jason uses the school's computer to print the phrase "I will not shoot paper clips in class", which he then tapes to the chalkboard (to which his teacher replies, "Jason, I meant write it by hand").
- In a 2003 strip, Jason saves time by writing a program in the C programming language to repeat the required phrase 500 times.
- In a 2005 strip, Jason writes a preemptive blank phrase on the chalkboard.
- In another strip, Jason is told to write "I will not say Eileen Jacobson is a space spore", which he emphasises to "I will not say EILEEN JACOBSON IS A SPACE SPORE" since the teacher never specified the font size.
- In a parody of the Simpsons intro featured in two episodes of Histeria!, Loud Kiddington is shown writing "I do not need a megaphone!"
- In the first episode of ChalkZone, Rudy Tabootie has to write "Cartoons are not funny".
- Around The Horn panelist Woody Paige features a chalkboard with a humorous saying, though it usually isn't a phrase repeated over and over, nor does it usually mention things the writer won't do anymore.
