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Quotes

Girl: Mom! You mother us too much!

Mom: Enjoy it while you can kids! Because when you are grown up and I am dead, you will have no one to look after you!

The children depart for school. Dad enters living room.

Dad: Marge! A spider got near the car keys!

Mom: You did the right thing in coming to me, Homie.

Dad:: Papa Bear has a present for his Mama Bear.

Springfield Elementary. Miss Krabappel's class is having their picture taken.

Lady: Children, stop fidgeting! Bart Simpson, why are you scratching so much? Oh my goodness, you have head lice! How could this have happened?

Flashback to Van Houten residence. A monkey is atop the boy's head.

Milhouse: We found him asleep inside a wicker basket we bought at Pier One!

Springfield Elementary.

Boy{talking to himself}: Hey, how come I got lice and nothing bad happened to Milhouse?

Milhouse is suffering from ultralow body temperatures and is shivering.

Milhouse{talking to himself}: So cold...so very cold.

Mom:"I miss how Bart would say something and end with Dude."

Boy:"Here you go, Todd, the city edition."

Man:"The bridal feast of Bethchedruharrezeb?"

Girl:"Everything has a Pat Booneish Quality."

Woman: Come on Bart, your younger sister is not complaining.

Boy: The only reason Maggie is not complaining is because she cannot talk!

The baby removes her pacifier.

Baby: Daddily doodily!

Mom: The only thing I am high on is love! Love for my son and daughters. Yes, a little L.S.D. is all I need!

Dad is shocked by what Mom unitentionally said and ushers her out.

Dad: Come on Marge, let us get out of here before they change their minds about us!