Simpson and Delilah/Quotes
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Quotes
- Entire Simpson family is watching a game show
- Game show host: The capital of North Dakota is named after what German ruler?
- Homer: Hitler!
- Marge: Homer, I do not think there is a city named Hitler, North Dakota.
- Game show host: Bismarck is the correct answer! Now for our next question, the colors of the flag of Italy are red, white, and what other color?
- Bart: Orange?
- Marge: Yellow?
- Homer: Green!
- Lisa: Blue?
- Patty: Purple?
- Selma: Black?
- Game show host: Green is the correct answer!
- Homer: Woo hoo!
- Bart: Lucky guess, Dad.
- Homer: Shut up boy, I am doing better than you.
- Game show host: We will be back with more Grade School Challenge after a word from our sponsors.
- Sign at The Royal Majesty for the Obese or Gangly Gentleman, the store where Homer buys his suits: YOU RIP IT, YOU BUY IT.
- Homer: (strangling Bart) BOY! MUST! DIE!
Bart: I love you, Dad!
Homer: D'oh! (stops strangling) Dirty trick. Okay, I'm not going to kill you, but I'm going to tell you three things that are gonna haunt you for the rest of your days. You've ruined your father, you've crippled your family, and baldness is hereditary!
Bart: It is?! - Mr. Burns (after hearing about how much Homer defrauded the company for his Dimoxomil): BLAST HIS HIDE TO HADES!!
- [After hearing Dimoxinil is one thousand dollars]
Homer: A thousand bucks!? I can't afford that!
Salesclerk: Hmm...well, we do have a product which is more in your price range, however...
[pulls out giant jug labeled "Hair in a Drum" with a twenty dollar price sticker]
Salesclerk: I must assure you, that any hair growth you experience while using it will be purely coincidental. audio clip
- Last lines of episode
- Homer: I cannot believe it. I am stuck in the same old dead-end job that I was before and the kids are going to hate me because I am now unable to afford the things they wanted.
- Marge: Your job has always put food on our table, Homer, and the kids will get over it.
- Homer: But how about our realtionship? I am bald and ugly.
- Marge: Homer...breaks into song...You are so beautiful, to me.
