Itchy & Scratchy Land (theme park)
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Itchy and Scratchy Land
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Location Information
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Itchy and Scratchy Land is an Itchy and Scratchy themed amusement park owned by Itchy and Scratchy International.
History
On its opening day, the robotic animatronics suddenly went berserk, as predicted by Professor Frink's chaos theory. The robots, originally programmed not to harm the guests, now ran amok trying to kill both guests and staff, and everyone on the island was evacuated, save for the Simpsons, who were in the theme park at the time. Using the robots' sensitivity to flash photography as an advantage, they used cameras from a nearby store to defeat the robots, saving themselves and Itchy and Scratchy Land.
The park was believed to be back to normal soon after. A new land, the "BloodClot Center" opened in the park at around 2002.
Description
Like the TV Show, Itchy and Scratchy Land contains a huge amount of simulated violence, and the park was noted as the "Violentest Place on Earth." According to theme park associates, this was supposedly to educate children about the consequences of deadly mayhem.
Itchy and Scratchy Land sits on an island with the faces of Itchy and Scratchy carved onto the rock, and the theme park on top. Guests access the park by helicopter after parking their cars at a car park in the mainland (the car park has two sections: the Itchy section and a Scratchy section).
The park is made out of four "lands": Torture Land, Explosion Land, Searing Gas Pain Land, and Unecessary Surgery Land. Rides and attractions include:
- The Head Basher
- Blood Bath
- Mangler
- The Nauseator
- Log Ride
There is an attraction called the Roger Meyers Story, detailing the story of Roger Meyers Sr., the creator of Itchy and Scratchy. The park also contains a "Parents Island" exclusively for parents, where parents can "consume alcoholic bevereges, learn new recipes, hammock-loafing, watch hours of television, or delude themselves into living in the 70's again". The island contains a 70's Disco and "T.G.I. McScratchy's Goodtime Fooddrinkery", where parents can relive New Years Eve over and over.
The park has a restaurant with all the menu choices in the form of violent names. For example, the cheeseburger is called the "Brain Burger" and the "Baby Guts" is another name for veal. Shops in the park include a gift shop selling "Bort" license plates, a penny arcade, and a camera shop. The park also has a daycare center with a large ball pit, and its own fire station. It is reported that the park contains the "finest Amusement-Park-run ER and triage center" in the state, with a 95% survival rate.
There is a 12 noon "Robot Parade" with animatronic replicas of Itchy and Scratchy, anthropomorphic bombs and weapons and costumed characters. The robotic Itchy and Scratchy's are programmed to attack each other while not harming the guests, instead spraying fake blood at them. The animatronics are extremely sensitive to flash photoraphy.
Backstage
All park operations are controlled at a command center deep underground. The underground complex contains a detention center and a repair center for the animatronic robots.
Behind the Scenes
Itchy and Scratchy Land is a parody of Disneyland, complete with a similar park layout and similar attractions.
