Difference between revisions of "Marge in Chains/Quotes"
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− | + | '''Mr. Burns''': Who the devil are you? | |
− | |||
− | |||
− | + | '''Homer's Brain''': Don't panic. Just come up with a good story. | |
− | + | '''Homer''': My name is Mr. Burns! | |
− | + | '''Homer's Brain''': D'oh! | |
− | + | ---- | |
− | + | '''Bart''': Who's gonna change Maggie? | |
− | |||
− | |||
+ | '''Homer''': We're going to let her roam free in the backyard and nature will take its course. | ||
---- | ---- | ||
+ | '''Chief Wiggum''': All right, come out with your hands up, two cups of coffee, an auto freshener that says 'Capricorn', and something with coconut on it! | ||
+ | ---- | ||
+ | '''Lisa''': It seems like I've been wearing this same red dress forever! | ||
+ | ---- | ||
+ | '''Crowd''': We need a cure! We need a cure! | ||
− | :''' | + | '''Dr. Hibbert''': Ho ho ho. Why, the only cure is bedrest. Anything I give you would be a placebo. |
− | + | ||
+ | '''Woman''': [frantic] Where can we get these placebos? | ||
+ | ---- | ||
+ | '''Flanders''': Watch Fox and be damned for all eternity. | ||
+ | ---- | ||
+ | '''Lisa''': Mom, could you bring me more O.J.? | ||
+ | '''Bart''': Mom, could you get me some of those Flintstones chewable morphine? | ||
---- | ---- | ||
+ | '''Chief Wiggum''': All right, come out with your hands up, two cups of coffee, an auto freshener that says 'Capricorn', and something with coconut on it! | ||
+ | ---- | ||
+ | '''Lisa''': You're a latter-day Clarence Darrow! | ||
+ | '''Lionel Hutz''': Uh, was he the black guy on the Mod Squad? | ||
+ | ---- | ||
+ | '''Homer''': Marge, I'm going to miss you so much. And it's not just the sex. It's also the food preparation. | ||
+ | ---- | ||
+ | '''Homer''': Now, kids, while your mother's gone, I don't want to have to wash any dishes, so from now on, drink straight from the faucet or milk carton, and we'll eat while standing over the sink or toilet. | ||
+ | ---- | ||
+ | '''Lionel Hutz''': Now don't you worry, Mrs. Simpson, I- uh-oh. We've drawn Judge Snyder. | ||
− | + | '''Marge''': Is that bad? | |
− | |||
− | |||
− | + | '''Lionel Hutz''': Well, he's kind of had it in for me, since I accidently ran over his dog. Actually, replace "accidently" with "repeatedly," and replace "dog" with "son." | |
+ | ---- | ||
+ | '''Nelson''': Hah-hah! Your mom's a jailbird! | ||
+ | |||
+ | '''Bart''': So's yours. | ||
+ | |||
+ | '''Nelson''': Oh yeah. | ||
+ | ---- | ||
+ | '''Marge''': Knock, knock. I'm Marge Simpson, your new cellmate. | ||
+ | |||
+ | '''Phillips''': I'm Phillips. They called me that because I killed my husband with a Phillips-head screwdriver. | ||
+ | ---- | ||
+ | (Lionel Hutz tries to give Judge Snyder a fake verdict) | ||
+ | |||
+ | '''Judge Snyder''': This verdict is written on a cocktail napkin. And it still says "guilty." And "guilty" is spelled wrong! | ||
+ | ---- | ||
+ | '''Lionel Hutz''': If there's one thing America needs, it's more lawyers. | ||
+ | ---- |
Revision as of 19:18, September 17, 2010
Mr. Burns: Who the devil are you?
Homer's Brain: Don't panic. Just come up with a good story.
Homer: My name is Mr. Burns!
Homer's Brain: D'oh!
Bart: Who's gonna change Maggie?
Homer: We're going to let her roam free in the backyard and nature will take its course.
Chief Wiggum: All right, come out with your hands up, two cups of coffee, an auto freshener that says 'Capricorn', and something with coconut on it!
Lisa: It seems like I've been wearing this same red dress forever!
Crowd: We need a cure! We need a cure!
Dr. Hibbert: Ho ho ho. Why, the only cure is bedrest. Anything I give you would be a placebo.
Woman: [frantic] Where can we get these placebos?
Flanders: Watch Fox and be damned for all eternity.
Lisa: Mom, could you bring me more O.J.?
Bart: Mom, could you get me some of those Flintstones chewable morphine?
Chief Wiggum: All right, come out with your hands up, two cups of coffee, an auto freshener that says 'Capricorn', and something with coconut on it!
Lisa: You're a latter-day Clarence Darrow! Lionel Hutz: Uh, was he the black guy on the Mod Squad?
Homer: Marge, I'm going to miss you so much. And it's not just the sex. It's also the food preparation.
Homer: Now, kids, while your mother's gone, I don't want to have to wash any dishes, so from now on, drink straight from the faucet or milk carton, and we'll eat while standing over the sink or toilet.
Lionel Hutz: Now don't you worry, Mrs. Simpson, I- uh-oh. We've drawn Judge Snyder.
Marge: Is that bad?
Lionel Hutz: Well, he's kind of had it in for me, since I accidently ran over his dog. Actually, replace "accidently" with "repeatedly," and replace "dog" with "son."
Nelson: Hah-hah! Your mom's a jailbird!
Bart: So's yours.
Nelson: Oh yeah.
Marge: Knock, knock. I'm Marge Simpson, your new cellmate.
Phillips: I'm Phillips. They called me that because I killed my husband with a Phillips-head screwdriver.
(Lionel Hutz tries to give Judge Snyder a fake verdict)
Judge Snyder: This verdict is written on a cocktail napkin. And it still says "guilty." And "guilty" is spelled wrong!
Lionel Hutz: If there's one thing America needs, it's more lawyers.