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(A rat crawls out of a trash can, Ralph comes out shortly after)
Ralph Wiggum: The rat symbolizes obviousness!
Bart: Skinner's five steps ahead of me! I put a tack on his chair, he's corked his pants. I throw a tomato, he's making salad.
Ralph Wiggum: (about Donny) When he grows up, I want to be like me!
Homer: Unlike love, respect can't be bought.
Lisa: I never dreamed an American car designed in Germany, assembled in Mexico from parts made in Canada, could be so amazing.
(After the Diet Coke and Mentos explosion.)
Superintendent Chalmers: Skinner! (pause) Skinner?
Principal Skinner: I'm alright, sir.
Superintendent Chalmers: Don't ever scare me like that again.
Donny: Hey, Krabappel! Your name sounds like "Crabapple." Did you go sour waiting for someone to pick you?
Mrs. Krabappel: (sighs) Pretty much.
Superintendent Chalmers: We're gonna put Bart Simpson away for a long, long time.
Principal Skinner: By law, the most we can give him is a 10-day suspension.
Superintendent Chalmers: That's long to a kid.
Homer [singing to the tune of Yes' "Owner of a Lonely Heart"]: Driver of a loaner car...
Principal Skinner: Sorry to plop, plop on your fizz, fizz.