The Time Bandit!/Quotes
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- Lisa: Just three more days!
- Bart: What's in three days? The annual dork of the year awards? I'd say you're the front-runner for MVPP—most valuable party pooper!
- Lisa: For your information, Bart, the 25th just happens to be mom and dad's anniversary!
- Bart: Wh-where are we, Professor Frink?
- Professor Frink: Not where are we! [NG-HEY!] When are we? It looks like my machine still functions, and it has transported us back in time!
- Bart: Aye, carumba!
- Homer: Uh, hi Krusty. I'm Homey Simpson and I'm your biggest fan. Because of you, I want to be a comedian too someday, and I was hoping you could help me with my act.
- Bart: Well, it was cool seeing mom and dad as kids, but I better get back to the time machine before Professor Frink does. Hold the phone... What do we have here? Dad's joke book! This would be the perfect anniversary gift! And if mom has something in her desk too.. awesome! It's mom's personal diary, too! I'll definitely beat Lisa this year if I take these back to the future with me...
- Barney Gumble: Stop right there, thief! That new kid's stealing from our desks!
- Bart: What? No, wait! You don't understand!
- Marge: That's my diary!
- Homer: And that's my joke book!
- Bart: Aye, carumba! You're not gonna believe me, so I'll just say this... ...later, man!
- Homer: Sorry that kid took your diary, Margie.
- Marge: Thanks, Homey. I'm sorry he took your joke book, too.
- Homer: Eh, It's nothing I can't copy from "mad" magaine again. Hey, this ist he first time you and I have ever talked to each other.
- Marge: That's true.
- Homer: So... you wanna play kick the can?
- Marge: Umm... okay.