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The contents of this article or section are considered to be non-canon and therefore may not have actually happened or existed.
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| "Incompetent Husband"
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| Song Information
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"Incompetent Husband" is a song performed by the grocery store clerk, Julio, Homer, Marge and other grocery store employees.
- Grocery store clerk:
- Incompetent husband,
- You weak little punk.
- Your selfless wife buys creams,
- To soothe the rash on your junk.
- Julio:
- Incompetent husband,
- Just be a grown man.
- She didn't flinch,
- When she bought you an XL bed pan.
- Grocery store clerk and Julio:
- You weren't even injured,
- You weren't even sick,
- Just too drunk to make it to the can.
- All employees:
- To the can, to the can,
- To the can, can, can.
- Homer:
- Stop shaming me In front of Hans Moleman.
- Grocery store clerk:
- Oh, we're just getting started.
- Your fungus has infections.
- Your infections have the runs.
- Julio:
- Gassy nipples, crotch foot,
- Massive hemorrhoids on your buns.
- Homer:
- You said they don't remember,
- Or care what we buy.
- Marge:
- It's a little disconcerting,
- But I'm glad they're on my side.
- Grocery store clerk:
- She gets you meds for blood pressure,
- Cholesterol and gout.
- Homer:
- I wanna get the tampons,
- But I can't figure it out.
- All employees:
- Yes, you can, yes, you can,
- Yes, you can, can, can.
- She texted you a photo of the brand.
- Incompetent husband, we're so onto you.
- You're only bad at doing things you don't want to do.
- You can't be this stupid,
- I's all just a ruse.
- Homer:
- Okay, okay. I'll do it. I'll buy my wife tampons.
- Just tell me where they are.
- All employees:
- Incompetent husband, aisle two.
Behind the Laughter[edit]
"Incompetent Husband" is a parody of "Gee, Officer Krupke" from the musical West Side Story.
Appearances[edit]
