Bart Sells His Soul/Quotes
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- Reverend Lovejoy: [discovering Bart's hymn prank] "Wait a minute! This sounds like rock and/or roll!"
- Sunday school room. Reverend Lovejoy has assembled all the children to find the culprit.
- Reverend Lovejoy: Everyone, repeat after me.
- Reverend Lovejoy & Children{in unison}: If I withhold the truth may I go straight to Hell where I will eat naught but burning hot coals and drink naught but burning hot cola.
- Children are visibly terrified except for Bart.
- Bart{sarcastically}: Where my soul will be chopped into a million little pieces and used as confetti upon a parade of murderers and single mothers.
- Milhouse{serious}: Where hungry birds will eat my soul!
- Outdoors a raven looks through the window at Milhouse
- Raven: Squawk!
- Milhouse: Bart did it! That Bart over there!
- Bart: Milhouse!
- Lisa: [saying Grace] "May God have mercy on my soul, and Dad's soul, and Mom's soul, and Maggie's soul, and everybody else's soul."
- Bart: "There's no such thing as a soul. It's just something they make up to scare kids, like the Boogeyman or Michael Jackson." (See References for explanation.)
- Bart: [praying] "Are you there, God? It's me, Bart Simpson. I know I never paid attention at church, but I could really use some of that good stuff now. I'm...afraid. I'm afraid some weirdo's got my soul and I don't know what they're doing to it! I just want it back. Please? [starts crying] Oh, I hope you can hear this." [Bart's "soul paper" floats down from above]
