Bart Simpson's Report on Francis Scott Key/Quotes
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- Edna Krabappel: Gee, Bart, normally when you fake report, you at least hold a piece a paper in your hand. This ought to be good.
- Bart: Uh, my report is on Francis Scott Key... uh... a really, really, really... uh... great song writer.
- Francis Scott Key: Hey, what's the hold up, Colonel Skinner? We got a gig in an hour, and I don't like my fans waiting.
- Colonel Skinner: Sorry, Key man, but the war of 1812 is on.
- Francis Scott Key: A war?
- Colonel Skinner: I'm sorry, Key man. The Twilight's last gleaming is just about over and I've got to get home in time to heat up mother's chicken pot pie.
- Francis Scott Key: I got it! A song about chicken pot pies! No, wait! Even better!
- Bart: And with the warning label, Key man's new CD sales went through the roof! He won back the groupies and the war of 1812! Thank you. Thank you.
- Bart: Ya know, it's bad enough I'm missing Independence Day to rewrite this paper, but did you have to invite the whole town to celebrate next to the school?
- Edna Krabappel: No, I didn't. Ha! Now keep writing!
