Little Orphan Bart/Quotes

Quotes

Kent Brockman: Our top story tonight, it's officially the slowest news day in history! In our only other story, the tory factory that makes Radioactive Man action figures is offering a free tour...

Bart: Yes!

Kent Brockman: ...for the local orphanage!

Bart: D'oh! Those lucky orphans!

Lisa: Yeah, that's quite a stroke of good fortune they're all having. But what are you gonna do?

Mr. Burns: Hello, new orphan!

Bart: Aaaah! Mr. Burns? What are you doing here?

Mr. Burns: Oh, I own this orphanage! You see, young man, like many here, I too lost my parents to tragic accidents that I've legally never been connected to. It makes me feel good to give to those less fortunate.

Marge: Violet, you don't have to sleep on the floor. It's okay to use Bart's bed!

Poor Violet: Thank you, but no, ma'am! I tried it, but [COUGH] I've never slept on anything softer than a hard wooden board before. It make my back all twisty [COUGH]

Marge: Ewwww! You poor thing. Well, breakfast is ready when you feel straight enough to eat.

Marge: Have a good day at school, Lisa, and try to help Violet fit in!

Lisa: I've spent the last three years trying to get me to fit in.

Marge: Just try, Lisa. She's a nice little girl who really could use some friends.

Marge: Grampa? What are you doing here?

Grampa: I was looking for the bathroom at the home and got lost. Hey there, Lisa!

Poor Violet: [COUGH!]

Grampa: Wait a minute! I recognize that cough!

Marge: You do?

Grampa: It comes from years of neglect! Most of the folks at the home have got it!

Poor Violet: Is there [COUGH] a cure?

Grampa: Yep! You need attention, and plenty of it! Quick, tell me a long rambling story about how bad things were for you! WE need to get it out of your system! Stat!