The Front/Quotes
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- Homer's Brain: OK Homer, it is time to admit to Marge your darkest secret!
- Homer: Marge, I have a confession to make. I ate the fancy soaps you bought that you were going to give as a wedding present!
- Marge gasps
- Homer's Brain: Not that one! The other deep, dark secret!
- Homer: Actually Marge, I never graduated from high school! I got an incomplete in Remedial Science 1A and failed to acquire the necessary credits for my diploma.
- Marge: That still does not explain why you ate the soaps...actually, maybe it does.
- Grampa: (writing a letter') Dear Mr. President, there are too many states nowadays. Please eliminate three. I am not a crackpot.
- Principal Dondelinger: Good evening, I will be your teacher for Remedial Science 1A. I have figured going back to teaching is the best way to get over my wife's death. Tonight we will be learning about calories. To show you calories I will burn this chocolate donut by this bunsen burner. The bright blue flame indicates it was an especially sweet donut.
- Homer bursts into tears at seeing such a donut wasted. Student sitting next to Homer places his hand on Homer's shoulder to comfort him.
