Difference between revisions of "Lisa's Substitute/Quotes"
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|episode=Lisa's Substitute | |episode=Lisa's Substitute | ||
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− | (Bart shows the whole classroom the tape for his project called, "How Kittens Are Born: The Ugly Truth") | + | ''(Bart shows the whole classroom the tape for his project called, "How Kittens Are Born: The Ugly Truth")'' |
− | :'''Bart''': …and here comes Snowball II. This is the one we kept. | + | :'''Bart''': "…and here comes Snowball II. This is the one we kept." |
− | :'''All''': EWW!! | + | :'''All''': "EWW!!" |
− | :'''Bart''': We were gonna keep the gray one, but the mother ate her. | + | :'''Bart''': "We were gonna keep the gray one, but the mother ate her." |
− | :'''All''': EWWWWW!! | + | :'''All''': "EWWWWW!!" |
− | :'''Martin''': Mrs. Krabappel, he's traumatizing the children! | + | :'''Martin''': "Mrs. Krabappel, he's traumatizing the children!" |
− | :'''Mrs. Krabappel''': As usual, I agree with you, Martin. Bart, shut that off and take your seat immediately! | + | :'''Mrs. Krabappel''': "As usual, I agree with you, Martin. Bart, shut that off and take your seat immediately!" |
− | :'''Bart''': Oh, look! This is really cool. When I hit reverse, I can make 'em go back in. | + | :'''Bart''': "Oh, look! This is really cool. When I hit reverse, I can make 'em go back in." |
− | (The whole classroom screams) | + | ''(The whole classroom screams)'' |
---- | ---- | ||
:''Mr. Bergstrom is leading the second grade in a rendition of "Home on the Range".'' | :''Mr. Bergstrom is leading the second grade in a rendition of "Home on the Range".'' | ||
− | :'''Janey''' | + | :'''Janey''': ''(Laughing)'' "Lisa, look at this!" |
:''Lisa unfurls Janey's note to see it is a caricature of Mr. Bergstrom singing.'' | :''Lisa unfurls Janey's note to see it is a caricature of Mr. Bergstrom singing.'' | ||
− | :'''Caricature #1''': THE SINGING DORK. | + | :'''Caricature #1''': [THE SINGING DORK.] |
:''Lisa is caught by Mr. Bergstrom.'' | :''Lisa is caught by Mr. Bergstrom.'' | ||
− | :'''Mr. Bergstrom''': Did you draw this? | + | :'''Mr. Bergstrom''': "Did you draw this?" |
− | :'''Lisa''': No, of course not! Uh, although now I almost wish I did. | + | :'''Lisa''': "No, of course not! Uh, although now I almost wish I did." |
− | :'''Mr. Bergstrom''': I like it. I was going to request if I may have it. | + | :'''Mr. Bergstrom''': "I like it. I was going to request if I may have it." |
− | :'''Lisa''': Oh sure! | + | :'''Lisa''': "Oh sure!" |
:''Lisa gives caricature to Mr. Bergstrom, who continues the song.'' | :''Lisa gives caricature to Mr. Bergstrom, who continues the song.'' | ||
− | :'''Janey''' | + | :'''Janey''': ''(Whispering)'' "Lisa, look at this!" |
:''Lisa unfurls Janey's note to see it is a caricature of herself singing.'' | :''Lisa unfurls Janey's note to see it is a caricature of herself singing.'' | ||
− | :'''Caricature #2''': THE SINGING DORKETTE. | + | :'''Caricature #2''': [THE SINGING DORKETTE.] |
---- | ---- | ||
:''Lisa sees Miss Hoover has returned.'' | :''Lisa sees Miss Hoover has returned.'' | ||
− | :'''Lisa''': Where is Mr. Bergstrom?! | + | :'''Lisa''': "Where is Mr. Bergstrom?!" |
− | :'''Miss Hoover''': I do not know, but I would sure like to have words with him! | + | :'''Miss Hoover''': "I do not know, but I would sure like to have words with him!" |
− | :'''Miss Hoover''': He didn't touch my lesson plan. What did he teach you? | + | :'''Miss Hoover''': "He didn't touch my lesson plan. What did he teach you?" |
− | :'''Lisa''': That life is worth living. | + | :'''Lisa''': "That life is worth living." |
---- | ---- | ||
− | :'''Miss Hoover''': You see, class, my Lyme Disease turned out to be (Spells on blackboard) psychosomatic. | + | :'''Miss Hoover''': "You see, class, my Lyme Disease turned out to be" ''(Spells on blackboard)'' "psychosomatic." |
− | :'''Ralph''': Does that mean you're crazy? | + | :'''Ralph''': "Does that mean you're crazy?" |
− | :'''Janey''': No, that means she was faking it. | + | :'''Janey''': "No, that means she was faking it." |
− | :'''Miss Hoover''': No, actually, it was a little of both. | + | :'''Miss Hoover''': "No, actually, it was a little of both." |
---- | ---- | ||
− | :'''Lisa''': You, sir, are a baboon! | + | :'''Lisa''': "You, sir, are a baboon!" |
− | :'''Homer''': (gasp) Me? | + | :'''Homer''': ''(gasp)'' "Me?" |
− | :'''Lisa''': Yes, you! Baboon! Baboon! Baboon! Baboon! | + | :'''Lisa''': "Yes, you! Baboon! Baboon! Baboon! Baboon!" |
− | :'''Homer''': I don't think you realize what you're saying… | + | :'''Homer''': "I don't think you realize what you're saying…" |
− | :'''Lisa''': BABOON! | + | :'''Lisa''': "BABOON!" |
---- | ---- | ||
− | :'''Homer''': Lisa, don't hold anything back, you can tell me. Are you crying 'cause you called daddy a baboon? | + | :'''Homer''': "Lisa, don't hold anything back, you can tell me. Are you crying 'cause you called daddy a baboon?" |
− | :'''Lisa''': No! | + | :'''Lisa''': "No!" |
− | :'''Homer''': Nuts. I know you are sad because you lost a man you care about. I cannot relate because everyone I care about is under this roof. In a way I consider myself lucky. If you want think I am a baboon I can be one. | + | :'''Homer''': "Nuts. I know you are sad because you lost a man you care about. I cannot relate because everyone I care about is under this roof. In a way I consider myself lucky. If you want think I am a baboon I can be one." |
:''Homer makes monkey noises and apes about Lisa's bedroom, which makes her laugh.'' | :''Homer makes monkey noises and apes about Lisa's bedroom, which makes her laugh.'' | ||
− | :'''Homer''': So are we all well? | + | :'''Homer''': "So are we all well?" |
− | :'''Lisa''': Yes, Dad. | + | :'''Lisa''': "Yes, Dad." |
:''Bart's bedroom. He is angrily throwing a rubber ball against the wall.'' | :''Bart's bedroom. He is angrily throwing a rubber ball against the wall.'' | ||
− | :'''Bart''' | + | :'''Bart:'''''(talking to himself)'' "Stupid Martin Prince!" |
:''Homer enters bedroom.'' | :''Homer enters bedroom.'' | ||
− | :'''Homer''': Bart, does the class president get paid? | + | :'''Homer''': "Bart, does the class president get paid?" |
− | :'''Bart''': No. | + | :'''Bart''': "No." |
− | :'''Homer''': Does he have to do extra work? | + | :'''Homer''': "Does he have to do extra work?" |
− | :'''Bart''': Yes. | + | :'''Bart''': "Yes." |
− | :'''Homer''': And is this Martin Prince going to get to do anything neat, like throw out the first ball at the World Series? | + | :'''Homer''': "And is this Martin Prince going to get to do anything neat, like throw out the first ball at the World Series?" |
− | :'''Bart''': Hell no! | + | :'''Bart''': "Hell no!" |
− | :'''Homer''': So let the baby have his bottle! That is what I always tell myself. | + | :'''Homer''': "So let the baby have his bottle! That is what I always tell myself." |
− | :'''Bart''': Thanks, Dad. | + | :'''Bart''': "Thanks, Dad." |
---- | ---- | ||
{{Season 2 Q}} | {{Season 2 Q}} |
Revision as of 23:00, June 20, 2010
(Bart shows the whole classroom the tape for his project called, "How Kittens Are Born: The Ugly Truth")
- Bart: "…and here comes Snowball II. This is the one we kept."
- All: "EWW!!"
- Bart: "We were gonna keep the gray one, but the mother ate her."
- All: "EWWWWW!!"
- Martin: "Mrs. Krabappel, he's traumatizing the children!"
- Mrs. Krabappel: "As usual, I agree with you, Martin. Bart, shut that off and take your seat immediately!"
- Bart: "Oh, look! This is really cool. When I hit reverse, I can make 'em go back in."
(The whole classroom screams)
- Mr. Bergstrom is leading the second grade in a rendition of "Home on the Range".
- Janey: (Laughing) "Lisa, look at this!"
- Lisa unfurls Janey's note to see it is a caricature of Mr. Bergstrom singing.
- Caricature #1: [THE SINGING DORK.]
- Lisa is caught by Mr. Bergstrom.
- Mr. Bergstrom: "Did you draw this?"
- Lisa: "No, of course not! Uh, although now I almost wish I did."
- Mr. Bergstrom: "I like it. I was going to request if I may have it."
- Lisa: "Oh sure!"
- Lisa gives caricature to Mr. Bergstrom, who continues the song.
- Janey: (Whispering) "Lisa, look at this!"
- Lisa unfurls Janey's note to see it is a caricature of herself singing.
- Caricature #2: [THE SINGING DORKETTE.]
- Lisa sees Miss Hoover has returned.
- Lisa: "Where is Mr. Bergstrom?!"
- Miss Hoover: "I do not know, but I would sure like to have words with him!"
- Miss Hoover: "He didn't touch my lesson plan. What did he teach you?"
- Lisa: "That life is worth living."
- Miss Hoover: "You see, class, my Lyme Disease turned out to be" (Spells on blackboard) "psychosomatic."
- Ralph: "Does that mean you're crazy?"
- Janey: "No, that means she was faking it."
- Miss Hoover: "No, actually, it was a little of both."
- Lisa: "You, sir, are a baboon!"
- Homer: (gasp) "Me?"
- Lisa: "Yes, you! Baboon! Baboon! Baboon! Baboon!"
- Homer: "I don't think you realize what you're saying…"
- Lisa: "BABOON!"
- Homer: "Lisa, don't hold anything back, you can tell me. Are you crying 'cause you called daddy a baboon?"
- Lisa: "No!"
- Homer: "Nuts. I know you are sad because you lost a man you care about. I cannot relate because everyone I care about is under this roof. In a way I consider myself lucky. If you want think I am a baboon I can be one."
- Homer makes monkey noises and apes about Lisa's bedroom, which makes her laugh.
- Homer: "So are we all well?"
- Lisa: "Yes, Dad."
- Bart's bedroom. He is angrily throwing a rubber ball against the wall.
- Bart:(talking to himself) "Stupid Martin Prince!"
- Homer enters bedroom.
- Homer: "Bart, does the class president get paid?"
- Bart: "No."
- Homer: "Does he have to do extra work?"
- Bart: "Yes."
- Homer: "And is this Martin Prince going to get to do anything neat, like throw out the first ball at the World Series?"
- Bart: "Hell no!"
- Homer: "So let the baby have his bottle! That is what I always tell myself."
- Bart: "Thanks, Dad."