Difference between revisions of "Bart Gets an "F"/Quotes"
Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki
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{{TabQ|episode=Bart_Gets_an_F}} | {{TabQ|episode=Bart_Gets_an_F}} | ||
| − | :''Bart awakens and realizes he has not studied for his test today'' | + | {{EpisodePrevNextQuo |Some Enchanted Evening|Simpson and Delilah}} |
| + | |||
| + | :''[Bart awakens and realizes he has not studied for his test today]'' | ||
:'''[[Bart]]''': Otto man, I have a test I am so not ready for! Could you help out your pal and crash the bus? | :'''[[Bart]]''': Otto man, I have a test I am so not ready for! Could you help out your pal and crash the bus? | ||
:'''[[Otto]]''': Whoa! Sorry Bart dude, state law prohibits me from crashing the bus on purpose. But who knows, you may get lucky and we could have an accident! | :'''[[Otto]]''': Whoa! Sorry Bart dude, state law prohibits me from crashing the bus on purpose. But who knows, you may get lucky and we could have an accident! | ||
| − | :'''Bart''' | + | :'''Bart''': ''[talking to himself]'' No need to panic. Just pal up with some brain, sponge the answers, then I am back on Easy Street! |
:'''Sherri''': Look! It is Bart Simpson. | :'''Sherri''': Look! It is Bart Simpson. | ||
:'''Terri''': I will bet he did not study for the test, and now he is trying to play up to us! | :'''Terri''': I will bet he did not study for the test, and now he is trying to play up to us! | ||
:'''Bart''': Good morning girls! | :'''Bart''': Good morning girls! | ||
| − | :'''Sherri & Terri''' | + | :'''Sherri & Terri''': ''[sweetly in unison]'' Good morning Bart! |
:'''Bart''': Who is up for a power cram session? I will go first. What was the name of the Pilgrims' ship? | :'''Bart''': Who is up for a power cram session? I will go first. What was the name of the Pilgrims' ship? | ||
:'''Sherri''': ''The Spirit of Saint Louis''. | :'''Sherri''': ''The Spirit of Saint Louis''. | ||
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:'''Bart''': Speak English, man! | :'''Bart''': Speak English, man! | ||
:'''Martin''': A blindfolded chimp with a pencil in his teeth stands a better chance at passing this test than you do! | :'''Martin''': A blindfolded chimp with a pencil in his teeth stands a better chance at passing this test than you do! | ||
| − | :'''Bart''' | + | :'''Bart''': ''[dejectedly]'' Thanks for the pep talk, poindexter. |
| + | |||
---- | ---- | ||
| − | :''Bart's bedroom. He has feigned illness to get out of a test.'' | + | |
| − | :'''Lisa''': Everybody knows you are faking it. | + | :''[Bart's bedroom. He has feigned illness to get out of a test.]'' |
| + | :'''[[Lisa]]''': Everybody knows you are faking it. | ||
:'''Bart''': Well, ''everybody'' had better keep their mouth shut! | :'''Bart''': Well, ''everybody'' had better keep their mouth shut! | ||
:'''Lisa''': You cannot run away from your responsibilities forever. You are bound to fail that test sooner or later. | :'''Lisa''': You cannot run away from your responsibilities forever. You are bound to fail that test sooner or later. | ||
:'''Bart''': I got my bases covered. | :'''Bart''': I got my bases covered. | ||
| − | :''Bart picks up phone and dials Milhouse'' | + | :''[Bart picks up phone and dials Milhouse]'' |
:'''Bart''': Milhouse, my man! How was school? I missed Lewis shooting milk out of his nose? You do not say? Listen, on the history test what did you get for Question #1? OK, how about Question #2? | :'''Bart''': Milhouse, my man! How was school? I missed Lewis shooting milk out of his nose? You do not say? Listen, on the history test what did you get for Question #1? OK, how about Question #2? | ||
:''Bart is writing down Milhouse's fed answers. Scene changes to Springfield Elementary, where Bart is confidently writing on the test.'' | :''Bart is writing down Milhouse's fed answers. Scene changes to Springfield Elementary, where Bart is confidently writing on the test.'' | ||
:'''Bart''': I think you will be pleasantly surprised. | :'''Bart''': I think you will be pleasantly surprised. | ||
:''Bart hands over test to Mrs. Krabappel, who marks it up.'' | :''Bart hands over test to Mrs. Krabappel, who marks it up.'' | ||
| − | :'''Edna Krabappel''': I cannot believe it! This is even worse than Milhouse's exam! Bart Simpson, I warned you! | + | :'''[[Edna Krabappel]]''': I cannot believe it! This is even worse than Milhouse's exam! Bart Simpson, I warned you! |
| + | |||
---- | ---- | ||
| − | :''Bart in class. He is stressed at contemplating the seriousness of this situation'' | + | |
| − | :'''Doctor Pryor''' | + | :''[Bart in class. He is stressed at contemplating the seriousness of this situation]'' |
| + | :'''Doctor Pryor''': ''[echoing in Bart's mind]'' I am afraid my recommendation is for Bart Simpson to repeat the fourth grade. | ||
:'''[[Edna Krabappel]]''': Class, the topic is world literature... | :'''[[Edna Krabappel]]''': Class, the topic is world literature... | ||
:''Bart imagines the future, Edna Krabappel is now elderly'' | :''Bart imagines the future, Edna Krabappel is now elderly'' | ||
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:'''Bart Simpson Junior'''{whispering}: Long John Silver, Dad! | :'''Bart Simpson Junior'''{whispering}: Long John Silver, Dad! | ||
:'''Edna Krabappel''': I heard that, Bart Junior! I want to see both of you after class! | :'''Edna Krabappel''': I heard that, Bart Junior! I want to see both of you after class! | ||
| − | :'''Bart Sr & Bart Jr''' | + | :'''Bart Sr & Bart Jr''': ''[in unison]'' DOH! |
| + | |||
---- | ---- | ||
| + | |||
:'''Bart''': Woo hoo! A snow day! Last one out is a rotten egg! | :'''Bart''': Woo hoo! A snow day! Last one out is a rotten egg! | ||
:''Bart is stopped by Lisa'' | :''Bart is stopped by Lisa'' | ||
:'''Lisa''': I heard you praying last night. You asked God to make it so that He would close the school and He did. I do not know much about the existance of God, but I do know this; He is a force more powerful than Mom and Dad put together and you owe Him big. | :'''Lisa''': I heard you praying last night. You asked God to make it so that He would close the school and He did. I do not know much about the existance of God, but I do know this; He is a force more powerful than Mom and Dad put together and you owe Him big. | ||
| + | |||
---- | ---- | ||
| − | :''Bart has had to hide himself in the basement in order to shield himself from the tempation of the fun people are having outdoors with the snow day.'' | + | |
| − | :'''Bart''' | + | :''[Bart has had to hide himself in the basement in order to shield himself from the tempation of the fun people are having outdoors with the snow day.]'' |
| + | :'''Bart''': ''[talking to himself]'' Concentrate, man! Do you want to be held back? OK, Chapter 4. The Founders decided they had enough of British oppression and decided to secede from England... | ||
:''July 4th, 1776. Bart imagines himself a member of the First Continental Congress witnessing the declaration.'' | :''July 4th, 1776. Bart imagines himself a member of the First Continental Congress witnessing the declaration.'' | ||
:'''Thomas Jefferson''': We hold these truths to be self-evident. | :'''Thomas Jefferson''': We hold these truths to be self-evident. | ||
| − | :'''Bart''' | + | :'''Bart''': ''[talking to himself]'' We hold these truths to be self-evident. |
:'''Thomas Jefferson''': That all men are created equal. | :'''Thomas Jefferson''': That all men are created equal. | ||
| − | :'''Bart''' | + | :'''Bart''': ''[talking to himself]'' That all men are created equal. |
:'''Thomas Jefferson''': And are entitled to... | :'''Thomas Jefferson''': And are entitled to... | ||
:'''John Mason''': Snow! | :'''John Mason''': Snow! | ||
| Line 63: | Line 73: | ||
:'''Thomas Jefferson''': Snow in July? It is a miracle! | :'''Thomas Jefferson''': Snow in July? It is a miracle! | ||
:'''Robert Morris''': Let us go out and play! | :'''Robert Morris''': Let us go out and play! | ||
| − | :'''First Continental Congress''' | + | :'''First Continental Congress''': ''[in unison]'' Yeah! |
:''Entire Continental Congress runs outdoors except for Bart, who looks out the window.'' | :''Entire Continental Congress runs outdoors except for Bart, who looks out the window.'' | ||
:'''John Adams''': Look everybody, John Hancock wrote his name in the snow! | :'''John Adams''': Look everybody, John Hancock wrote his name in the snow! | ||
| + | |||
---- | ---- | ||
| − | :''Bart in class. Students are finishing their history tests and submit them to the teacher.'' | + | |
| − | :'''Martin''': Later Mrs. K. | + | :''[Bart in class. Students are finishing their history tests and submit them to the teacher.]'' |
| + | :'''[[Martin]]''': Later Mrs. K. | ||
:'''Mrs. Krabappel''': Martin? OK Bart, time is up. Hand over your test. | :'''Mrs. Krabappel''': Martin? OK Bart, time is up. Hand over your test. | ||
:'''Bart''': Mrs. Krabappel, could you please grade this right now? | :'''Bart''': Mrs. Krabappel, could you please grade this right now? | ||
| Line 76: | Line 88: | ||
:'''Bart''': Oh, no. | :'''Bart''': Oh, no. | ||
:'''Mrs. Krabappel''': Yes, I know, another year, oh it's gonna be hell. | :'''Mrs. Krabappel''': Yes, I know, another year, oh it's gonna be hell. | ||
| − | :''Bart starts crying'' | + | :''[Bart starts crying]'' |
:'''Mrs. Krabappel''': Bart, I thought you were used to failing. | :'''Mrs. Krabappel''': Bart, I thought you were used to failing. | ||
| − | :'''Bart''': | + | :'''Bart''': ''[still crying]'' No..you don't understand. I tried. I really tried. |
:'''Mrs. Krabappel''': Hey Bart, it is a high F. | :'''Mrs. Krabappel''': Hey Bart, it is a high F. | ||
:'''Bart''': I cannot do anything right. I feel just like George Washington when he had no choice but to surrender Fort Neccessity to the French. | :'''Bart''': I cannot do anything right. I feel just like George Washington when he had no choice but to surrender Fort Neccessity to the French. | ||
| Line 85: | Line 97: | ||
:''Mrs. Krabappel skims through a history textbook.'' | :''Mrs. Krabappel skims through a history textbook.'' | ||
:'''Mrs. Krabappel''': Why Bart, you showed applied knowledge! And given the obscurity of that battle it is only fair to award you one point. That raises your grade to a 60, or D-. | :'''Mrs. Krabappel''': Why Bart, you showed applied knowledge! And given the obscurity of that battle it is only fair to award you one point. That raises your grade to a 60, or D-. | ||
| − | :'''Bart''' | + | :'''Bart''': ''[overjoyed]'' You mean I passed? |
:'''Mrs. Krabappel''': Barely. | :'''Mrs. Krabappel''': Barely. | ||
| − | + | ||
| − | |||
{{Season 2 Q}} | {{Season 2 Q}} | ||
[[Category:Quotes]] | [[Category:Quotes]] | ||
Revision as of 19:52, August 23, 2010
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- [Bart awakens and realizes he has not studied for his test today]
- Bart: Otto man, I have a test I am so not ready for! Could you help out your pal and crash the bus?
- Otto: Whoa! Sorry Bart dude, state law prohibits me from crashing the bus on purpose. But who knows, you may get lucky and we could have an accident!
- Bart: [talking to himself] No need to panic. Just pal up with some brain, sponge the answers, then I am back on Easy Street!
- Sherri: Look! It is Bart Simpson.
- Terri: I will bet he did not study for the test, and now he is trying to play up to us!
- Bart: Good morning girls!
- Sherri & Terri: [sweetly in unison] Good morning Bart!
- Bart: Who is up for a power cram session? I will go first. What was the name of the Pilgrims' ship?
- Sherri: The Spirit of Saint Louis.
- Bart: Where was their original destination?
- Terri: Sunny Acapulco.
- Bart: And why did they leave England?
- Sherri: Giant rats.
- Sherri & Terri snicker to themselves as Bart is writing in a notebook
- Bart: Cool, history is coming alive!
- School bus arrives at Springfield Elementary. Students exit bus.
- Martin Prince: As a natural enemy, I do not know why I am doing this, but I feel obliged to tell you that the information you just received is grossly erroneous.
- Bart: Speak English, man!
- Martin: A blindfolded chimp with a pencil in his teeth stands a better chance at passing this test than you do!
- Bart: [dejectedly] Thanks for the pep talk, poindexter.
- [Bart's bedroom. He has feigned illness to get out of a test.]
- Lisa: Everybody knows you are faking it.
- Bart: Well, everybody had better keep their mouth shut!
- Lisa: You cannot run away from your responsibilities forever. You are bound to fail that test sooner or later.
- Bart: I got my bases covered.
- [Bart picks up phone and dials Milhouse]
- Bart: Milhouse, my man! How was school? I missed Lewis shooting milk out of his nose? You do not say? Listen, on the history test what did you get for Question #1? OK, how about Question #2?
- Bart is writing down Milhouse's fed answers. Scene changes to Springfield Elementary, where Bart is confidently writing on the test.
- Bart: I think you will be pleasantly surprised.
- Bart hands over test to Mrs. Krabappel, who marks it up.
- Edna Krabappel: I cannot believe it! This is even worse than Milhouse's exam! Bart Simpson, I warned you!
- [Bart in class. He is stressed at contemplating the seriousness of this situation]
- Doctor Pryor: [echoing in Bart's mind] I am afraid my recommendation is for Bart Simpson to repeat the fourth grade.
- Edna Krabappel: Class, the topic is world literature...
- Bart imagines the future, Edna Krabappel is now elderly
- Edna Krabappel{aged}: The topic is world literature. Let us start with Treasure Island by Robert Louis Stevenson. Can anyone tell me the name of the pirate...Bart Simpson Senior?
- Bart is now a full-grown man
- Bart Simpson Senior: Ah lady, come on. My kid has the chicken pox, my wife has been nagging me for a new car and I need a root canal. So can you please cut me some slack and stop asking me for the name of that stupid pirate?
- Bart Simpson Junior (who bears an uncanny resemblance to his father at that age) is seated next to his father, and is presumably a more serious student
- Bart Simpson Junior{whispering}: Long John Silver, Dad!
- Edna Krabappel: I heard that, Bart Junior! I want to see both of you after class!
- Bart Sr & Bart Jr: [in unison] DOH!
- Bart: Woo hoo! A snow day! Last one out is a rotten egg!
- Bart is stopped by Lisa
- Lisa: I heard you praying last night. You asked God to make it so that He would close the school and He did. I do not know much about the existance of God, but I do know this; He is a force more powerful than Mom and Dad put together and you owe Him big.
- [Bart has had to hide himself in the basement in order to shield himself from the tempation of the fun people are having outdoors with the snow day.]
- Bart: [talking to himself] Concentrate, man! Do you want to be held back? OK, Chapter 4. The Founders decided they had enough of British oppression and decided to secede from England...
- July 4th, 1776. Bart imagines himself a member of the First Continental Congress witnessing the declaration.
- Thomas Jefferson: We hold these truths to be self-evident.
- Bart: [talking to himself] We hold these truths to be self-evident.
- Thomas Jefferson: That all men are created equal.
- Bart: [talking to himself] That all men are created equal.
- Thomas Jefferson: And are entitled to...
- John Mason: Snow!
- John Adams: Look everyone! It is snowing!
- Thomas Jefferson: Snow in July? It is a miracle!
- Robert Morris: Let us go out and play!
- First Continental Congress: [in unison] Yeah!
- Entire Continental Congress runs outdoors except for Bart, who looks out the window.
- John Adams: Look everybody, John Hancock wrote his name in the snow!
- [Bart in class. Students are finishing their history tests and submit them to the teacher.]
- Martin: Later Mrs. K.
- Mrs. Krabappel: Martin? OK Bart, time is up. Hand over your test.
- Bart: Mrs. Krabappel, could you please grade this right now?
- Mrs. Krabappel: Very well, let me get out "Old Red".
- Mrs. Krabappel produces a red pen and begins marking up the test.
- Mrs. Krabappel: That's 59, Bart, another F.
- Bart: Oh, no.
- Mrs. Krabappel: Yes, I know, another year, oh it's gonna be hell.
- [Bart starts crying]
- Mrs. Krabappel: Bart, I thought you were used to failing.
- Bart: [still crying] No..you don't understand. I tried. I really tried.
- Mrs. Krabappel: Hey Bart, it is a high F.
- Bart: I cannot do anything right. I feel just like George Washington when he had no choice but to surrender Fort Neccessity to the French.
- Mrs. Krabappel: What did you say?!
- Bart: Fort Neccesity. George Washington lost that battle to the French in 1754.
- Mrs. Krabappel skims through a history textbook.
- Mrs. Krabappel: Why Bart, you showed applied knowledge! And given the obscurity of that battle it is only fair to award you one point. That raises your grade to a 60, or D-.
- Bart: [overjoyed] You mean I passed?
- Mrs. Krabappel: Barely.
