To Live and Diaper in Springfield/Quotes
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- Marge: Family, I have an announchement.
- Homer: But Marge, the police are chasing some guy on the highway, live! I want to see how it ends.
- Marge: Homer, they always end the same way. he runs out of gas or gets stuck in traffic and the police catch him. Okay?
- Ned Flanders: Hi-diddily-ho, Marge. What seems to be the problem?
- Marge: Maggie just rode away on Bart's skateboard! This is terrible! I've got to get her! Can you look after the daycare and call the police?
- Ned: No problemo! I'll be your toodler coddler!
- Professor Lombardo: Never fear, my young, budding Picassos, your teacher is here! Dear sir, it would be an honor if you would allow me the pleasure of guiding your lieges through their first stroeks on the canvas.
- Ned: Alrighty by me. I sohuld get home anywhy. I've been meaning to rotate the bibles. We don't like any of them to feel like we're favoring the others by giving them a place of promincence on the ol' bookshelf, If you need anything, I'll be right next door.
- Professor Lombardo: All I need is a medium, a sudent, and a muse. All right children, let's create genius!
- Kent Brockman: This is Kent Brockman with "Eye on Springfield". You, the viewer, have let it be known that, ratings to the contrary, you're sick of ambush journalism exposing all that's wrong with Springfield. So I'm here to do an uplifting story on what's right with our town. My fifth wife, who was also my second wife, told me about a wonderful new daycare center that we're sending our um, son to, er, I think. We're paying a surprise visit, Live, to show you the quaility of daycare that's available in our hometown. Let's go inside and take a look.
- Kent Brockman: Are either of you in charge here?
- Marge: Um, I guess I...
- Krusty the Clown: I'm in charge, here, Kent. That's right Springfield, this is just another example of the finde daycare that you get at Krustykids Daykare Centers! I'm proud to be the owner of this daycare, um, place. Hoo-heh-heh-heh!
- Kent Brockman: Then Krusty, whould you care to explain the horrific, dare I say, apocalyptic, conditions found here A passed-out drunk as the primiary caregive, decrepitated walls, and a pungent odor I haven't smelled since a buffalo licked me during my guest shot on "Ya-Hoo!"
- Krusty: Hooh-heh... what?
