Difference between revisions of "Homer's Odyssey/Quotes"
Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki
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|episode=Homer's Odyssey | |episode=Homer's Odyssey | ||
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| + | {{EpisodePrevNextQuo |Bart the Genius|There's No Disgrace Like Home}} | ||
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:'''Mrs. Krabappel''': ''[blows whistle]'' Now class remember, I don't want this field trip to be a repeat of our infamous visit to the Springfield State Prison. So I want all to be on your best behavior, especially you Bart Simpson. | :'''Mrs. Krabappel''': ''[blows whistle]'' Now class remember, I don't want this field trip to be a repeat of our infamous visit to the Springfield State Prison. So I want all to be on your best behavior, especially you Bart Simpson. | ||
:'''Bart''': Mrs. Krabappel, I didn't unlock that door. | :'''Bart''': Mrs. Krabappel, I didn't unlock that door. | ||
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| − | :'' | + | :''[at Moe's Tavern]'' |
:'''Homer''': I'm just a technical supervisor who cared too much. | :'''Homer''': I'm just a technical supervisor who cared too much. | ||
:''[phone rings]'' | :''[phone rings]'' | ||
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:'''Moe''': Oh I don't know, he's tough to catch. He keeps changing his name. | :'''Moe''': Oh I don't know, he's tough to catch. He keeps changing his name. | ||
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:'''[[Moe Szyslak|Moe]]''': I don't think you're ever going to get another job and be able to pay me back. | :'''[[Moe Szyslak|Moe]]''': I don't think you're ever going to get another job and be able to pay me back. | ||
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:'''[[Bart Simpson|Bart]]''': All he does is lie there like an unemployed whale. | :'''[[Bart Simpson|Bart]]''': All he does is lie there like an unemployed whale. | ||
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:'''Bart''': There's only one thing we can do. Take advantage of the guy. ''[Holds up a report card]'' I need you to sign this, Homer. ''[Bart picks up Homer's hand and writes his signature on the card.]'' | :'''Bart''': There's only one thing we can do. Take advantage of the guy. ''[Holds up a report card]'' I need you to sign this, Homer. ''[Bart picks up Homer's hand and writes his signature on the card.]'' | ||
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:'''[[Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': Damn it! I'm no supervising technician. I'm a technical supervisor. It's too late to teach this old dog new tricks. | :'''[[Homer Simpson|Homer]]''': Damn it! I'm no supervising technician. I'm a technical supervisor. It's too late to teach this old dog new tricks. | ||
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:'''Smilin' Joe Fission''': I'll just put it where nobody'll find it for a million years. | :'''Smilin' Joe Fission''': I'll just put it where nobody'll find it for a million years. | ||
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:'''[[Marge Simpson|Marge]]''': There, there, Homer. You've caused plenty of industrial accidents and you've always bounced back. | :'''[[Marge Simpson|Marge]]''': There, there, Homer. You've caused plenty of industrial accidents and you've always bounced back. | ||
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:'''Homer''': You can't depend on me all your lives. You have to learn that there's a little Homer Simpson in all of us. | :'''Homer''': You can't depend on me all your lives. You have to learn that there's a little Homer Simpson in all of us. | ||
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:'''Homer''': Unlike most of you, I am not a nut. | :'''Homer''': Unlike most of you, I am not a nut. | ||
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:'''Homer''': Our lives are in the hands of men no smarter than you or I. Many of them incompetent boobs. I know this because I've worked alongside them, gone bowling with them, watched them pass me over for promotions time and again. | :'''Homer''': Our lives are in the hands of men no smarter than you or I. Many of them incompetent boobs. I know this because I've worked alongside them, gone bowling with them, watched them pass me over for promotions time and again. | ||
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:'''TV Announcer #1''': Loaftime, the cable network for the unemployed, will be right back with more tips on how to win the lottery right after this. | :'''TV Announcer #1''': Loaftime, the cable network for the unemployed, will be right back with more tips on how to win the lottery right after this. | ||
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:'''Homer''': Beer! Now there's a temporary solution. | :'''Homer''': Beer! Now there's a temporary solution. | ||
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:'''[[Sherri and Terri|Sherri]]''': Hey, Bart. Our dad says your dad is incompetent. | :'''[[Sherri and Terri|Sherri]]''': Hey, Bart. Our dad says your dad is incompetent. | ||
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:'''Bart''': Oh, okay. I thought you were putting him down. | :'''Bart''': Oh, okay. I thought you were putting him down. | ||
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:'''[[Clancy Wiggum|Chief Wiggum]]''': Well, it's no secret. Our city is under siege by a graffiti vandal known as, "El Barto". Police artist have a composite sketch to go over and if anyone has any information, please contact us immediately. | :'''[[Clancy Wiggum|Chief Wiggum]]''': Well, it's no secret. Our city is under siege by a graffiti vandal known as, "El Barto". Police artist have a composite sketch to go over and if anyone has any information, please contact us immediately. | ||
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{{Season 1 Q}} | {{Season 1 Q}} | ||
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Revision as of 21:02, August 9, 2010
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- Mrs. Krabappel: [blows whistle] Now class remember, I don't want this field trip to be a repeat of our infamous visit to the Springfield State Prison. So I want all to be on your best behavior, especially you Bart Simpson.
- Bart: Mrs. Krabappel, I didn't unlock that door.
- [at Moe's Tavern]
- Homer: I'm just a technical supervisor who cared too much.
- [phone rings]
- Moe: Moe's Tavern.
- Bart: [on phone] Is Mr. Freely there?
- Moe: Who?
- Bart: Freely, first initials I.P.
- Moe: OK, I'll check. Uh, is I.P. Freely here? Hey everbody, I.P. Freely!
- [patrons laugh]
- Moe: Wait a minute. Listen to me you lousy bum. When I get a hold of you, you're dead, I swear I'm going to slice your heart in half!
- [Bart and Lisa laugh]
- Homer: You'll get that punk someday, Moe.
- Moe: Oh I don't know, he's tough to catch. He keeps changing his name.
- Moe: I don't think you're ever going to get another job and be able to pay me back.
- Bart: All he does is lie there like an unemployed whale.
- Lisa: I don't know what else to do.
- [Maggie pokes him in the eye]
- Bart: There's only one thing we can do. Take advantage of the guy. [Holds up a report card] I need you to sign this, Homer. [Bart picks up Homer's hand and writes his signature on the card.]
- Homer: Damn it! I'm no supervising technician. I'm a technical supervisor. It's too late to teach this old dog new tricks.
- Smilin' Joe Fission: I'll just put it where nobody'll find it for a million years.
- Marge: There, there, Homer. You've caused plenty of industrial accidents and you've always bounced back.
- Homer: You can't depend on me all your lives. You have to learn that there's a little Homer Simpson in all of us.
- Homer: Unlike most of you, I am not a nut.
- Homer: Our lives are in the hands of men no smarter than you or I. Many of them incompetent boobs. I know this because I've worked alongside them, gone bowling with them, watched them pass me over for promotions time and again.
- TV Announcer #1: Loaftime, the cable network for the unemployed, will be right back with more tips on how to win the lottery right after this.
- TV Announcer #2: Unemployed? Out of work? Sober? You sat around the house all day, but now it's Duff time. Duff, the beer that makes the days fly by.
- Duff TV Jingle: You can't get enough of the wonderful Duff. Duff Beer!
- Homer: Beer! Now there's a temporary solution.
- Sherri: Hey, Bart. Our dad says your dad is incompetent.
- Bart: What does 'incompetent' mean?
- Terri: It means he spends more time yakking and scarfing down donuts than doing his job.
- Bart: Oh, okay. I thought you were putting him down.
- Chief Wiggum: Well, it's no secret. Our city is under siege by a graffiti vandal known as, "El Barto". Police artist have a composite sketch to go over and if anyone has any information, please contact us immediately.
- [A sketch of an older, stubbly, mean-looking version of Bart is passed around]
- Bart: Cool, man.
