C.E. D'oh/Quotes

Quotes

Season 14 Episode Quotes

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305

"Mr. Spritz Goes to Washington"

306
"C.E. D'oh"

"'Scuse Me While I Miss the Sky"

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Homer: "So, kids, it's Valentine's Day, and you know what that means! You get to stay downstairs watching TV with the sound turned way up!"

Lisa: "What about you and mom?"

Homer: "Oh, we'll be upstairs in the bedroom, making love...ly...rope ladders, in case there's a fire."

Stark Richdale: "You see this watch? It's jammed with so many jewels, the hands can't move. [to Homer] What kind of watch do you have?"

Homer: "Uh, well, I drew it on. See?"

Richdale: "Uh-huh. You see that car out there? That's a Bentley Mark 12. They gave one to me, one to Steven Spielberg, then they shot the guy who made it!"

Lenny: "Wow, I'd hate to be in that union."

Homer: "Listen up life obstacles! From now on, nothing's gonna stand in Homer Simpson's way! [to Bart] Do your homework! [to Lisa] Don't do so much homework! [to Maggie] Learn to talk! [to Marge] You! Let's love! Now!"

Marge: "Sounds good to me!"

Homer: [tries to carry Marge up the stairs but runs out of breath] "Go on ahead! I'll just slow you down!"

Mr. Burns: "Now, a few more details about this year's company picnic-it's at the plant, no food will be served, the only activity will be work, and the picnic is cancelled."

Homer: "Mr. Burns' reign of terror is over. [the workers cheer] And today begins my reign of terr... [the workers gasp in fear] ...iffic management! [the workers sigh in relief]

Lenny: "I thought he was gonna say 'terror.'"

Carl: "Oh, I don't think he was going that way."

Homer: "Unlike Mr. Burns, I will respect you, the working-class slob, because we are all equals! And now, as I ascend this crystal staircase to my office, I say-avert your gaze!"

Mr. Burns: "Well, now that I'm forcibly retired, I feel I should give back to society and do some charitable work, but... first I want to take a lot of opium."

[In the Marrakesh marketplace]

Smithers: [to shopkeeper] "Uh, excuse me! Do you know where I can buy some, uh... [whispers] drugs?"

Shopkeeper: [loudly] "Drugs? Everything is drugs! Banana made of drugs! Monkey made of drugs! Look! All market made of drugs!"

Smithers: [picks up a brick of hashish] "I'd like to buy this."

Shopkeeper: "Only American money! [whispers] Our money is made of drugs."

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