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Welcome to Moe's

Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki
"Welcome to Moe's"
Welcome to Moe's.png
Song Information
Singers: Julie Kavner
Hank Azaria
Nancy Cartwright
Yeardley Smith
Characters: Marge Simpson
Moe Szyslak
Bart Simpson
Lisa Simpson
Length: Episode: 0:42
Album: 1:17
Writer(s): Lyrics: Michael Price
Music: Alf Clausen
Album: The Simpsons: Testify
Appearance(s): "Mommie Beerest"

"Welcome to Moe's" is a song sung by Marge, Bart, Lisa, and Moe when Marge was convincing Moe to change his bar into a British pub.

Lyrics

Episode version

Marge:
This place is a diamond,
But it's trapped in the rough.
Moe:
Yeah, well the sign still says "Moe's",
So enough of your guff.
Marge:
Here's my new idea
To sell both beer and grub:
We will turn this filthy dive
Into a proper old-time British pub.
Moe:
A British bar?
Bart and Lisa:
[to the tune of "Rule Brittania"]
Darts and meat pies,
And lager in pint glasses.
What a classy way
To get drunk off your asses!
Moe:
Hey, hold the phone! An English pub! That just might work!
All:
In song!
Moe:
Oh, my bar could be British instead of arm-pittish,
So why don't we all--
Ah, screw it, let's get renovating.

Album version

Marge:
Maybe some cheerier paint would make this place less of a "dive."
Moe:
Marge, my customers don't like themselves. Therefore, they seek the darkness.
[the patrons moan]
Marge:
Well... as fabulous as your regulars are, a remodel might bring in a higher class of lush.
Moe:
Look, I like Moe's the way it is, all right? And I ain't changin' it for any dame, skirt, Susie-Q, or face-macer.
Marge:
I had a feeling you'd say that. So I prepared something that might help you change your tune.
This place is a diamond,
But it's trapped in the rough.
Moe:
Yeah, well the sign still says "Moe's",
So enough of your guff.
Marge:
Here's my new idea
To sell both beer and grub:
We will turn this filthy dive
Into a proper old-time British pub.
Moe:
A British bar?
Bart and Lisa:
[to the tune of "Rule Brittania"]
Darts and meat pies,
And lager in pint glasses.
What a classy way
To get drunk off your asses!
Moe:
Hey, hold the phone! An English pub! That just might work!
All:
In song!
Moe:
Oh, my bar could be British instead of arm-pittish,
So why don't we all--
Ah, screw it, let's get renovating.

Behind the Laughter

It is the twenty-fifth track on the album The Simpsons: Testify. Part of the song is set to the tune of "Rule, Britannia!" by Thomas Arne.

Appearances