Homer goes to Moe in the paleolithic, showing the birth of beer and english. Back to the present, Marge and Homer are making a list of people to invite for Thanksgiving Day, though they decide not to invite Moe due to him bringing a woman doll last year as his +1.
At Moe's Tavern, Homer brings him the news, and just after he recieve a prank call from Bart, Nelson and Milhouse, though this time he reverse it. To get back on him they try going to Herman's Military Antiques, where he brings them to the basement, showing them the dark net, where they order Moe a wife, Anastasia Alekova.
Anastasia brings changes to the tavern, making it nicer, and people starts coming in, though Moe's rudeness scare them away. She promises them a happy time, and the bar makes lots of money. After the closing time, Moe refuses her hand saying that his past loves left him heart broken, telling her the stories, ending with her leaving the bar, not before Moe tells her to bring out the bottles.
At home, Homer finds out Bart's secret, and he confesses about the prank on Moe, so he gets punished. Homer manages to convince Moe to conquer Anastasia back, so he goes to the Russian Tea House, where she works, only to find out she now has a girlfriend in Krusty.
The guys at the tavern though convince him to try and get her back from Krusty, breaking the clown's heart this time. Behind the tavern, the marriage between them was going to happen, before the contract is seen by Bart, saying that all Moe's properties would have gone to her, also revealing she's not Russian but from Columbus.
Once she fakes a scottish accent to appeal another man, Willie appears and fells in love with her. Nelson then flew to Mars where his father was working on a secret project. Upon seeing his son, Eddie told him that he was going for some space cigarettes then took a rocket away.