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John (Cockamamie's)

Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki
Revision as of 15:09, November 21, 2007 by Dr. Ralph Wiggum (talk)
John (Cockamamie's)
200px

name=John

Character Information
Gender: Male
Status:
Unknown
Age: Early 40's
Hair: Black
Occupation: Owner and propieter of Cockamie's Collectibles
Relatives: Unknown
First appearance: Homer's Phobia
Voiced by: John Waters


John is the homosexual owner of Cockamie's Collectibles.

Biography

Needing money to pay for the gas repair bill, the Simpson family visits "Cockamamie's", an offbeat collectibles shop, hoping that it will purchase one of the family's heirlooms. Homer meets John, the antiques dealer, who explains that much of the merchandise is there because of its camp value. Bart and Lisa are impressed with John, and Homer invites him to the Simpsons' house to see the campy items that the family owns. The next morning, Homer tells Marge that he likes John and suggests they invite him and "his wife" over. Marge hints repeatedly to an oblivious Homer that John is a homosexual, and when Homer finally understands, he is horrified. Homer's attitude towards John changes completely, and he turns against him, refusing to join his tour of Springfield. The rest of the family joins John and has a good time, but Homer is upset with the family upon their return. The rest of the Simpson family continue to enjoy John's company, especially Bart, who starts wearing Hawaiian shirts and dancing in a woman's wig. This makes Homer uneasy, and he begins to fear Bart is gay.

Homer endeavors to make Bart more masculine by forcing him to look at a cigarette billboard featuring scantily clad women in hopes Bart will be attracted to girls, but instead Bart gets the urge to smoke. Homer then escorts him to see a steel mill’s muscle-bound workforce, only to find that the factory in question moonlights as The Anvil, a homosexual disco. A desperate Homer insists on taking Bart deer hunting with Moe and Barney. When they cannot find any deer, they decide instead to go to Santa's Village and shoot the reindeer in the corral. This backfires when the reindeer attack them. John, with the help of Lisa and Marge, uses a Japanese Santa Claus robot to scare off the reindeer and save the hunting party. Homer accepts John, more or less, and tells Bart, who is still unaware of his father's concerns, that any way he lives his life is fine with him. After Lisa informs Bart that Homer thinks he is a homosexual, Bart is horrified. The episode ends with everyone driving off in John's car.