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Difference between revisions of "Pass, Puff, Puff"
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Revision as of 12:12, November 22, 2024
| Pass, Puff, Puff
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| Tapped Out Quest Information
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Pass, Puff, Puff is an event-exclusive questline in The Simpsons: Tapped Out. It was introduced in the Homer vs the 18th Amendment content update.
Dialogue
Intro
| After starting the update
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Dad, today's the day, you get to participate in our country's greatest tradition!
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An All-You-Can-Eat Buffet? But I didn't line my pockets with plastic bags.
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No, it's a chance to shape the democratic path of our nation. Contribute to the great American experiment. Sew your own mark in the tapestry that is our--
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Unsubscribe!
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I'm not an email newsletter, Dad. I just want you to vote! Because, despite how many petitions I've sent to the Governor, I still legally can't.
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I'll only vote if it's something I care about, like whether monkeys can drive taxis.
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It's about booze…
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Task: "Make Homer Vote on Proposition". The job takes place at the Town Hall and takes 6 seconds.
Task: "Make Springfielders Vote on Proposition" (x5). The jobs take place at the Town Hall and take 6 seconds.
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| After starting the jobs
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Aw, man. The last time I pressed a green yes button, a scientist gave me a bit of cheese. This time all I got was this dumb sticker.
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| After finishing the tasks
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Now before I deposit this bag of green from Big Green, I, uh, hereby legalize recreational marijuana and ban all other inebriants!
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Woohoo! Drinks on me!
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You just voted a measure that bans alcohol, but legalizes marijuana.
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Haw haw! You just voted against your own interests.
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The measure also banned condescending laughter.
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Haw wha?
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Quest reward:  1 and  10
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Pt. 1
| After completing the Intro
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No alcohol? What will I live for?
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Your family?
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This isn't a time for jokes, Marge. St. Patrick's Day is right around the corner. And everyone knows, if you don't drink on St. Patrick's Day, leprechauns will stab you in your sleep.
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I don't think that's right.
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Homer, the measure doesn't kick in until midnight. There's still time to stockpile! I for one won't be stabbed by those little lucky leps.
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To the Kwik-E-Mart!
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Task: "Make Homer Buyout Kwik-E-Mart Alcohol Stock". The job takes place at a Kwik-E-Mart and takes 3 hours.
Task: "Collect Drinks" (x240).
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I need all your alcohol, and I need it now.
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I always knew this day would come. Ever since I heard the news this morning.
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And when I say all the alcohol, that means rubbing alcohol, ethanol, and hand sanitizer.
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Quest reward:  100 and 10
Duff Puff and Unruly Crowd
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Pt. 2
| After completing Pt. 1
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This Duff Puff takes years of use before I'll have trouble remembering! I need beer to forget my life right now!
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I can't switch intoxicants – I already built a whole lifestyle around booze! I've even got a catchphrase: *buuuuuurp*
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And I don't like change. It's why I've haven't changed my shirt in thirty years.
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Homer, will you sell me a beer? I'll pay top dollar for it.
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Top dollar? I've only ever been offered bottom dollar, or middle at best. I'll do it!
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Guys. I'm standing right here. At least do something covert like, I don't know, say you're selling tickets to tour your house.
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Yeah! Let's break the law the way the Chief of Police recommends!
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Some days you really feel like you're making a difference.
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Task: "Make Homer Sell Tours". The job takes place at the Simpson House and takes 3 hours.
Task: "Collect Drinks" (x420).
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The first and last stop of my home tour – the basement! Please help yourself to some “refreshments”.
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Did you fill the washing machine with beers? I still had clothes in there.
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Free shirt with every purchase!
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
Bathtub Brewery
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Pt. 3
| After completing Pt. 2
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Dad! Your “refreshments” are almost gone!
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Sweetie, that's the same thing you said about the ozone layer. And yet here we are, totally fine, on another beautiful sweltering March day.
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Another three tours please!
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Yeah, tours all around!
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Hmm, not to worry - we'll just follow in the proud tradition of rum-runners, frat boys, and bored hipsters…
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Home Brew!
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Task: "Make Homer Brew Refreshments". The job takes place at the Simpson House and takes 3 hours.
Task: "Collect Drinks" (x420).
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| After starting the job
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The first batch is done. It's an IPA – improvised potable ale substitute. The S is silent. Like the strangely still lab mice Lisa tested it on.
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Mmm, it's got a rich smoky flavor with herbal overtones.
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Probably because I accidentally poured in grass trimmings and then it caught on fire.
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I don't care - give me another!
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I can only make them one at a time, because each beer is crafted with love. And because I only have the one bottle.
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| After finishing the tasks
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Dad, the mobs are dangerously sober and they are starting to get ideas – good ones!
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Man, I love being drunk. But I wish there was something else that wouldn't make me so nauseous.
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Now that I can't drink to forget about my glaucoma, how else will I cure it?
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I can't let these respectable town drunks become a bunch of high hippies. It's my job to bring back the high BACs.
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
Canadian Crossing and Free Land Token
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Pt. 4
| After completing Pt. 3
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I need some help smuggling booze into Springfield.
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You've come to the right place. Unlike that guy.
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This is not the type of leather bar I was hoping for.
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Hell's Satans have experience smuggling items across the Canadian border. Drugs, people, maple syrup candy.
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Task: "Make Homer Smuggle Alcohol From Canada". The job takes place at the Canadian Crossing and takes 3 hours.
Task: "Collect Drinks" (x420).
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| After starting the job
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Welcome to Canada, eh? Home of the constant apology. We're sorry for having such a lame motto.
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You can make it up to me by not checking my trunk.
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Sounds fair to me!
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| After finishing the tasks
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Marge! Kids! I'm back from Canada, so help me unload this illegal booze!
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*sigh* And that's only the third craziest thing he's said this week.
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Thanks to those bikers, our basement brewery is back in business!
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Fourth craziest…
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
Damaged Simpson House
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Pt. 5
| After completing Pt. 4
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Wow, business is so dead that it must be time for its reincarnation.
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Who knew that people only wanted to buy my overpriced greasy and sugary foods when they were intoxicated?
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What about the munchies? I was promised munchies!
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I wonder if the CEO of Duff can help me.
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Good thing I still have his phone number from that time he needed my help with a plot device.
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Task: "Make Apu Call Duff CEO". The job takes place at a Kwik-E-Mart and takes 60 minutes.
Task: "Collect Drinks" (x420).
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How did you get this number? And can I have it too? I'm tired of handing out blank business cards!
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The Internet.
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Yes, the Internet. I've heard good things about it.
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My business is failing. It turns out booze made up 99.99% of my income.
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I know what you mean. Sales have slumped since it became illegal to sell booze.
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Even our beer koozie and novelty hats-with-straws subdivisions have taken a hit. Who would've guessed?!
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Quest reward: 100 and 10
Howard K. Duff
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Pt. 6
| After completing Pt. 5
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Apu, I think we've got a new marketing direction: “Now introducing Duff Puff – reinventing intoxication! Instead of drinking fermented plants in a can, you'll drink plants in a can!”
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I don't want to trade hops for hemp!
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Then why did you vote to ban all alcohol?
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I thought I was entering a raffle.
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Hmm, how to sell Duff Puff? I never needed marketing before. Probably because I was selling an addictive intoxicant, unlike this stuff.
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Task: "Make Howard K. Duff Brainstorm Marketing Ideas". The job takes place at a Brown House and takes 3 hours.
Task: "Collect Drinks" (x420).
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Wow, this is hard. I brought in a dozen Harvard interns, but their best idea was to hire a consulting firm of Harvard grads.
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Maybe a search on the Internet will increase my productivity.
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Those four hours just flew by. And I've still got nothing. You know what, I'll just use an oldie but a goodie: free stuff!
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| Quest reward: 100 and 10
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Pt. 7
| After completing Pt. 6
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We'll sponsor a St. Patrick's Day parade and give out free samples of Duff Puff. Perhaps through a fountain of some sort.
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I just had the weirdest sense of déjà vu… Huh, guess this Duff Puff really works.
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Well, I've put in my two day work week! Now off to spend my twenty million quarterly bonus.
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| Task: "Make Howard K. Duff Give Out Samples". The job takes place at the Duff Float and takes 8 hours.
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| After starting the job
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Hey! That float is giving out free Duff Puff! This is even better than that time the gutter gave out free water!
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Whoa! I guess dreams really do come true. Except for that one where I'm being chased by a giant lobster I hope.
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| After finishing the task
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It seems the mob has gotten so drunk they're rioting, and so high they can't remember which businesses not to loot.
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At least St. Patrick's Day has finally brought people together to discover their true shared passion: property damage.
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Can't there be one national holiday that doesn't end in rioting?
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Arbor Day? No, wait, last year there was a riot at the toothpick factory.
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| Quest reward: 200 and 20
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