• New article from the Springfield Shopper: Krusty’s aunt helps repair Homer’s relationship with Patty and Selma this December!
  • Wikisimpsons needs more Featured Article, Picture, Quote, Episode and Comprehensive article nominations!
  • Wikisimpsons has a Discord server! Click here for your invite! Join to talk about the wiki, Simpsons and Tapped Out news, or just to talk to other users.
  • Make an account! It's easy, free, and your work on the wiki can be attributed to you.
TwitterFacebookDiscord

Difference between revisions of "Homerland/Quotes"

Wikisimpsons - The Simpsons Wiki
m (top: replaced: :'''[[ → {{qf| (8), ]]:''' → }} (8), :''' → {{qf| (74), {{qf| → }} (37), ''( → ''[ (3), )'' → ]'' (3))
 
(2 intermediate revisions by 2 users not shown)
Line 2: Line 2:
 
{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Dangers on a Train|Treehouse of Horror XXIV}}
 
{{EpisodePrevNextQuo|Dangers on a Train|Treehouse of Horror XXIV}}
  
:'''[[Lisa]]:''' Ooh, there's new marshmallows in the Belfast Charms!
+
{{qf|[[Lisa]]}} Ooh, there's new marshmallows in the [[Belfast Charms]]!
:'''[[Marge]]:''' No! No, that's Bart's cereal. It's the only way I can get him to take his "vitamins."
+
{{qf|[[Marge]]}} No! No, that's Bart's cereal. It's the only way I can get him to take his "vitamins."
 
----
 
----
:'''[[Bart]]:''' The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side.
+
{{qf|[[Bart]]}} The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side.
:'''Lisa:''' That's not right.
+
{{qf|Lisa}} That's not right.
:'''Bart:''' Yes, it is. They're my lines as the Scarecrow in <i>The Wizard of Oz.</i>
+
{{qf|Bart}} Yes, it is. They're my lines as the Scarecrow in ''The Wizard of Oz.''
 
----
 
----
:'''[[Selma]]:''' Well, he's not in the Boise morgue. Maybe he was mistaken for a dead elephant and flown back to Kenya.
+
{{qf|[[Selma Bouvier]]}} Well, he's not in the [[Boise]] morgue. Maybe he was mistaken for a dead elephant and flown back to [[Kenya]].
:'''Marge:''' You're talking about my husband.
+
{{qf|Marge}} You're talking about my husband.
:'''Selma:''' To spare your feelings, we'll just call him the Blob.  
+
{{qf|Selma}} To spare your feelings, we'll just call him the Blob.  
:'''[[Patty]]:''' Two to one says the Blob is stuck in the water-intake pipe at the reservoir.
+
{{qf|[[Patty Bouvier]]}} Two to one says the Blob is stuck in the water-intake pipe at the reservoir.
 
----
 
----
:'''[[Chief Wiggum]]:''' Sorry I'm late, everyone. I had some trouble getting the voice mails off the 9-1-1 line. Why does everyone have to talk so fast and panicky?
+
{{qf|[[Chief Wiggum]]}} Sorry I'm late, everyone. I had some trouble getting the voice mails off the 9-1-1 line. Why does everyone have to talk so fast and panicky?
:'''Man on the phone:''' ''(slowly and clearly)'' A man with a gun is in my house.
+
{{qf|Man on the phone}} ''[slowly and clearly]'' A man with a gun is in my house.
:'''Chief Wiggum:''' Gibberish.
+
{{qf|Chief Wiggum}} Gibberish.
 
----
 
----
:'''Marge:''' Homie, what happened to you?!
+
{{qf|Marge}} Homie, what happened to you?!
:'''Homer:''' I overslept, lost my cell phone, missed my flight.  
+
{{qf|[[Homer]]}} I overslept, lost my cell phone, missed my flight.  
:'''Marge:''' Why didn't you call us?
+
{{qf|Marge}} Why didn't you call us?
:'''Homer:''' Well, all the pay phone at the airport were replaced by self-serve yogurt. I ate all the cookie dough toppings a man could want.
+
{{qf|Homer}} Well, all the pay phone at the [[Springfield International Airport|airport]] were replaced by self-serve yogurt. I ate all the cookie dough toppings a man could want.
:'''Bart:''' So many cookies will never be born.
+
{{qf|Bart}} So many cookies will never be born.
 
----
 
----
:'''Marge:''' Dear Christian god...
+
{{qf|Marge}} Dear Christian god...
:'''Lisa:''' Hey!
+
{{qf|Lisa}} Hey!
:'''Marge:''' Sorry, dear god... You know which one I mean.
+
{{qf|Marge}} Sorry, dear god... You know which one I mean.
 
----
 
----
:'''Marge:''' I been having snuggle dreams.
+
{{qf|Marge}} I been having snuggle dreams.
:'''Homer:''' Marge, I changed in Boise. I'm not sure a man who eats right and doesn't drink.
+
{{qf|Homer}} Marge, I changed in Boise. I'm not sure a man who eats right and doesn't drink.
 
----
 
----
:'''Bart:''' I'm Bart Simpson. Who the hell are you?
+
{{qf|Bart}} I'm Bart Simpson. Who the hell are you?
:'''[[Annie Crawford]]:''' Agent Crawford, FBI.
+
{{qf|[[Annie Crawford]]}} Agent Crawford, [[FBI]].
:'''Bart:''' You guys know I don't talk to field agents. Get your boss on the phone.
+
{{qf|Bart}} You guys know I don't talk to field agents. Get your boss on the phone.
 
----
 
----
:'''Annie:''' Don't talk.
+
{{qf|Annie}} Don't talk.
:'''Homer:''' Okay.
+
{{qf|Homer}} Okay.
:'''Annie:''' I want you to know I'm the best there is at finding out what you're up to.
+
{{qf|Annie}} I want you to know I'm the best there is at finding out what you're up to.
:'''Homer:''' Ooh.
+
{{qf|Homer}} Ooh.
:'''Annie:''' I can torture you. I can give you incredible sex. Or you can just tell me what I want to know.
+
{{qf|Annie}} I can torture you. I can give you incredible sex. Or you can just tell me what I want to know.
:'''Homer:''' What was the first one again?
+
{{qf|Homer}} What was the first one again?
:'''Annie:''' I see. You're stupid.
+
{{qf|Annie}} I see. You're stupid.
:'''Homer:''' Hey. I'm the one in bed with two beautiful women.
+
{{qf|Homer}} Hey. I'm the one in bed with two beautiful women.
:'''Annie:''' ''(gasps)'' You think I'm beautiful? Oh!
+
{{qf|Annie}} ''[gasps]'' You think I'm beautiful? Oh!
:'''Homer:''' In a breaking-and-entering kind of way.
+
{{qf|Homer}} In a breaking-and-entering kind of way.
:'''Annie:''' Well, give me something or I'm not leaving.
+
{{qf|Annie}} Well, give me something or I'm not leaving.
 
----
 
----
:'''[[Apu]]:''' Chief Wiggum, how come every time there's a terrorist chatter in this town, you come to me?
+
{{qf|[[Apu]]}} Chief Wiggum, how come every time there's a terrorist chatter in this town, you come to me?
:'''Chief Wiggum:''' Lay off, Apu. When I look at people, I don't see colors. I just see crackpot religions.
+
{{qf|Chief Wiggum}} Lay off, Apu. When I look at people, I don't see colors. I just see crackpot religions.
 
----
 
----
:'''Lisa:''' Dad?!
+
{{qf|Lisa}} Dad?!
:'''Homer:''' Huh? How'd you get in here?
+
{{qf|Homer}} Huh? How'd you get in here?
:'''Lisa:''' Girl Scout Cookies get you in anywhere.
+
{{qf|Lisa}} Girl Scout Cookies get you in anywhere.
 
----
 
----
:'''Lisa:''' We did it, Dad. We did it.
+
{{qf|Lisa}} We did it, Dad. We did it.
:'''Homer:''' We sure did.
+
{{qf|Homer}} We sure did.
:'''Lisa:''' You weren't shot.
+
{{qf|Lisa}} You weren't shot.
:'''Homer:''' No, I was just up late watching a movie. Something with William Holden and... ''(snoring)''
+
{{qf|Homer}} No, I was just up late watching a movie. Something with William Holden and... ''[snoring]''
  
 
{{Season 25|Q}}
 
{{Season 25|Q}}

Latest revision as of 13:16, May 9, 2021


Season 25 Episode Quotes
530 "Dangers on a Train"
531
"Homerland"
"Treehouse of Horror XXIV" 532


Lisa: Ooh, there's new marshmallows in the Belfast Charms!
Marge: No! No, that's Bart's cereal. It's the only way I can get him to take his "vitamins."

Bart: The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side.
Lisa: That's not right.
Bart: Yes, it is. They're my lines as the Scarecrow in The Wizard of Oz.

Selma Bouvier: Well, he's not in the Boise morgue. Maybe he was mistaken for a dead elephant and flown back to Kenya.
Marge: You're talking about my husband.
Selma: To spare your feelings, we'll just call him the Blob.
Patty Bouvier: Two to one says the Blob is stuck in the water-intake pipe at the reservoir.

Chief Wiggum: Sorry I'm late, everyone. I had some trouble getting the voice mails off the 9-1-1 line. Why does everyone have to talk so fast and panicky?
Man on the phone: [slowly and clearly] A man with a gun is in my house.
Chief Wiggum: Gibberish.

Marge: Homie, what happened to you?!
Homer: I overslept, lost my cell phone, missed my flight.
Marge: Why didn't you call us?
Homer: Well, all the pay phone at the airport were replaced by self-serve yogurt. I ate all the cookie dough toppings a man could want.
Bart: So many cookies will never be born.

Marge: Dear Christian god...
Lisa: Hey!
Marge: Sorry, dear god... You know which one I mean.

Marge: I been having snuggle dreams.
Homer: Marge, I changed in Boise. I'm not sure a man who eats right and doesn't drink.

Bart: I'm Bart Simpson. Who the hell are you?
Annie Crawford: Agent Crawford, FBI.
Bart: You guys know I don't talk to field agents. Get your boss on the phone.

Annie: Don't talk.
Homer: Okay.
Annie: I want you to know I'm the best there is at finding out what you're up to.
Homer: Ooh.
Annie: I can torture you. I can give you incredible sex. Or you can just tell me what I want to know.
Homer: What was the first one again?
Annie: I see. You're stupid.
Homer: Hey. I'm the one in bed with two beautiful women.
Annie: [gasps] You think I'm beautiful? Oh!
Homer: In a breaking-and-entering kind of way.
Annie: Well, give me something or I'm not leaving.

Apu: Chief Wiggum, how come every time there's a terrorist chatter in this town, you come to me?
Chief Wiggum: Lay off, Apu. When I look at people, I don't see colors. I just see crackpot religions.

Lisa: Dad?!
Homer: Huh? How'd you get in here?
Lisa: Girl Scout Cookies get you in anywhere.

Lisa: We did it, Dad. We did it.
Homer: We sure did.
Lisa: You weren't shot.
Homer: No, I was just up late watching a movie. Something with William Holden and... [snoring]
Season 25 Quotes
Homerland Treehouse of Horror XXIV Four Regrettings and a Funeral YOLO Labor Pains The Kid Is All Right Yellow Subterfuge White Christmas Blues Steal This Episode Married to the Blob Specs and the City Diggs The Man Who Grew Too Much The Winter of His Content The War of Art You Don't Have to Live Like a Referee Luca$ Days of Future Future What to Expect When Bart's Expecting Brick Like Me Pay Pal The Yellow Badge of Cowardge