Drinker, Failure, Bowler, Spy

Drinker, Failure, Bowler, Spy is a Simpsons Comics story that appears in.

Plot
Moe bans Homer for life from Moe's Tavern, and as Homer explains, it is because of Ned Flanders one week ago. In a flashback, Ned is visiting Homer and follows him to Moe's. After Ned tastes Moe's house specialty, watered-down Duff, he complains about the place, and all the barflies, except Homer, agree. The next day, Ned opens his own bar, Ned's, on the other side of the street. Although Moe's barflies prefer Ned's, they do not want to be disloyal to Moe, so they explain why Ned's is better than his bar. Moe tries to improve his bar by using his secret weapon, a karaoke machine, but to no avail, and the barflies, save for Homer, choose to leave Moe's for Ned's. Moe thinks about how he can get his customers back and, after a failed attempt at spying at Ned's by posing as a bathroom attendant, he enlists Homer to visit Ned's and get taken in as a regular so he will learn Ned's secrets. Moe and Homer pretend to fight so that he is banned for life from Moe's and he can visit Ned's instead, linking to the present. Homer likes Ned's bar better than Moe's and forgets about his mission. When he later remembers why he is there, he asks about Ned's plans for the future.

Homer tells Moe about Ned's, and the next evening, Moe has a Hawaiian night just like Ned to attract customers. Due to an incident involving shattering glass, the themed evening is a fiasco for Moe's. Meanwhile, Ned's only becomes more popular, as he is serving free pie for Moleman's birthday in addition to theme night, so Homer visits him instead of Moe. Homer finds out that Ned has named a beer after him, Homerbrau, which makes him regret spying on the bar. The next day, when Homer learns that Moe is going to set hungry raccoons loose in Ned's, he tells it to Ned, who has already sprayed the bar against raccoons. Moe finds out that Homer revealed the plans to Ned, which makes Moe angry. Homer tells him that Ned is better than Moe because he treats every human like they should. Moe then realizes he must change his attitude, and Homer gives a tip to Moe about how he can close Ned's. With the help of the karaoke machine, he makes Ned think he gets a message from God that Moe will be a better person and he can close his bar, which he does. Moe gets back his regulars, and he promises to treat them better. He even buys up the rest of Ned's Homerbrau, and starts happy hour for the next thirty minutes.