Itchy & Scratchy Live!/Quotes


 * Seymour Skinner: So you think watching cartoons is more important than learning the Dewey decimal system?
 * Bart: Is there any way to answer that question that won't get me a month's detention?
 * Seymour Skinner: Let me tell you one thing, Bart! No one ever got anything out of watching cartoons!
 * Jimbo: Hey, everyone! Krusty is out front offering a big prize to whoever knows that most about Itchy and Scratchy!
 * Seymour Skinner: No, children! Come back! What about your library skills?


 * Krusty: In the episode "Law and Odor", what was Scratchy eaten by while serving jury duty?
 * Bart: The skunk judge... Judge Doody!
 * Krusty: How many time has Itchy married Scratchy?
 * Lisa: Twelve, but six were annulled.


 * Bart: It's a dream come true! Bart Simpson is finally going to be a cartoon character!


 * Scratchy: People of Springfield, welcome to "Itchy and Scratchy Live!" You wouldn't come to see Gilbert and Sullivan, but you'll come to this! For shame! Still... like the cartoons, it will only take two minutes of your time, and I promise... you'll never forget it!
 * Krusty: Wait! I never set this up! Someone was pretending to be me! Now cut me in for a piece of the action, or I'll shit this down!


 * Scratchy: And now sit back, relax, and enjoy the greatest show on Earth...
 * Sideshow Bob: The Death of Bart Simpson! Ha ha ha!
 * Bart: Sideshow Bob!
 * Sideshow Bob: Let's begin! Act one, scene one! Bart is chased by an axe-wielding maniac!
 * Bart: Aaaaaah!