Catch 'Em If You Can/Quotes

[about Bart] That boy failed show and tell, but he's on our ass like Sherlock Holmes!

[to Homer] Sir, what would you like for dinner? One Steak or two steaks? Can I have both? Of course, sir.

[watching over Bart and Lisa's objections] Your mother and I are trying to lose each other in this movie, so shut the hell up!

Beat it, you puck-slapping maple suckers. Take a hike, you Shatner-stealing Mexico touchers.


 * As the Bible says, to hell with that.

[to Bart and Lisa] Fine, stay here and rot with Grandpa. I'm only rotting on the right side! I'll right side you!

[to Marge] We're alone now. You're never alone in this crap shack. Why you little-- [smashes the wall with his arms and chokes Bart]

I'm going into the Gold Medallion club, with Silver Level membership! [laughs] The hell you are! [pulls out a shotgun]

It's your fault for giving birth to my arch enemy! At least I was planned! Stop it! No one was planned!

And now my darling. It's finally time for a romance. But before the intercourse. The dinner course! [opens the tray revealing Bart and Lisa inside shocking him and Marge] Busted! [to Homer and Marge] You guys lied to us! [Homer and Marge back away into the bed] You probably did this how all time. This whole family build a tissue of lies and romance. Yeah! It's a tissue cover of blood and boogers! [fed up] Would you two just shut up?! Sure we lied. We lied so we can spend a single night as a married couple without worrying about you kids. [swings his arm] Those days are over. Give it up. [sighs sadly] You win kids. Just sleep her tonight and we'll all go back to Springfield tomorrow. Great! [to Lisa] What you want to play? How about the floor is made of lava? [she and Bart run around the room laughing leaving Homer and Marge looking depressed] [sadly] All I want was a second Honeymoon. And now the floor is made of lava.