Happy Non-Specific Semi-Festive Winter Gathering/Quotes


 * [The Non-Specific Semi-Festive Winter Gathering is being held in the Springfield Elementary School gymnasium. Principal Skinner encourages the children to participate.]
 * Principal Skinner: Children! Come and decorate our non-holiday un-tree with colorful hall passes and mint-free sugar sticks!
 * Mrs. Krabappel: [sardonically] Give it up, Seymour.


 * [On the other side of the gymnasium, Groundskeeper Willie portrays Santa Claus.]
 * Milhouse: [sitting on Willie's lap] And I want an, and a turtle, and a puppy, and a racing car bed, and a pretend shopping cart ...
 * Willie: [interrupting] Aye, and Willie wants nae tah weep inta his pillow every night, but you don't see him beggin' favors from some centuries-old fat daftie like a soft-footed, weak-bellied bairn! [pause] I mean, "Ho, ho, ho" an' like that.


 *  [ Üter enters the gymnasium, towing three giant candies behind him in wagons.]
 * Üter: Children! Children! For der party I am dipping into mine private collection! Eat until you are mit der joy und sick!


 *  [ Martin plays a toy piano while Santa's Little Helper dances on it and Lisa listens raptly.]
 * Lisa: Carols are great and everything, but sometimes a girl likes to hear a nice, romantic dirge.