Homer Goes to Prep School/Quotes


 * Squeaky-voiced teen: For maximum safety, all children must wear anti-kidnapping bracelets.
 * Homer: Is this a kid you'd pay ransom for?
 * Bart: Dad, what would you do if you got my ear in the mail?
 * Homer: I don't know. Feed it to the dog?
 * Bart: You'd have to wrap cheese around it.
 * Homer: Don't you tell me how to feed you to the dog!


 * Shauna: I hate working here. At least at Krustyburger, you could burn yourself and go home.


 * Marge: Are you really so disappointed the world didn't end, just so you could be proven right?
 * Lloyd: No, no.It's just that, in the new world, I would have been a big shot.
 * Gary Chalmers: Well, not for long. Me and the others were planning to overthrow you and seal you in a cave.
 * Lloyd: Yeah, but what you didn't know was I was gonna poison all your drinking water.
 * Gary Chalmers: Which is why I'm only drinking my own urine.


 * Marge: What's going on?
 * Homer: Oh! I want to tell you, but I promised to keep it a secret.
 * Marge: You can't have secrets from your wife!
 * Homer: It's very late in the marriage to tell me that.


 * Homer: Marge, this is it, TEOTWAWKI!
 * Marge: "The end of the world as we know it"?
 * Homer: Uh-huh. Where's the kids?
 * Marge: Lisa and Maggie are downstairs, and Bart's in his room with Milhouse.
 * Homer: Boy, get in the car, and say good-bye to your best friend forever.
 * Bart: Bye forever, Milhouse.
 * Milhouse: See you, Bart.