Basketball's a Drag/Quotes


 * Willie: Due to budgetary constraints, we can only afford seven uniforms. Willie lobbied hard for extra funding, but, sadly, he has the cut one of ye. And that person is... ...Bart Simpson.
 * Nelson: Haw haw! You're a victim of buget cuts!


 * Milhouse: Sorry you didn't make the team, Bart.
 * Bart: [SIGH]
 * Milhouse: It's too bad you're not a girl.
 * Bart: What's that supposed to mean?!
 * Milhouse: Er. b-because then you'd be a star! I mean they need more players!
 * Bart: You're right! They're so desperate, even Lisa gets to play.


 * Bart: Seems like you deperately need a player, and I need a chance to play.
 * Seymour Skinner: Whare are you proposing?
 * Bart as Lisa: Behold, you new female star payer!
 * Seymour Skinner: Hmmm. if you pretend to be your sister, we might have a shot at finally beating Shelbyville.
 * Lisa: Where did you get that wig?
 * Bart: I've got my sources.
 * Milhouse: I've been robbed!


 * Bart as Lisa: Whaddya think?
 * Lisa: Hmmm... I suppose you make a convincing girl.
 * Bart as Lisa: After the championship game never say that to me again, Lis.


 * Bart as Lisa: Great practice... eh, girls? I'm going home to play with my Malibu Stacy and listen to NPR---
 * Sherri/Terri: We all know it's you Bart.
 * Bart as Lisa: Wha-huh?!
 * Janey: Yeah! We knw you're just here to make sure we win.
 * Sherri/Terri: You maybe a good play, but this isn't fun for the rest us!
 * Bart as Lisa: Fun? Sports are about winning. "Winning isn't everything... it's the only thing." I'm pretty sure Gandhi said that.