A Midsummer's Nice Dreams/Quotes


 * : So, you know, uh, check your barometer, thermometer, anemometer... Why does everything have to have an "ometer" on it?
 * : And what is rain, man? It's like we're in the apartment under God and his fat sister overflowed the tub.


 * Bart: How now mad spirit, before we part, tis I Mischevious stand puckish, Bart. Was not I the players did disturb twas the doings of a green and naughty herb. The Gods have righted every wrong. Cheech the stoner, has his Chong. And, Homer, he is back with mom. You can watch us tomorrow at hulu.com


 * Krusty: When they asked me to introduce Cheech and Chong, I said, "How much?" And they said, "We don't pay for introductions," so I said, "Then I don't need this crummy gig." And they said, "Yes, you do," and I said... "Ladies and gentlemen, Cheech and Chong!"
 * : Who is it?
 * : It's me, Dave, man. Open up. I got the stuff.
 * Homer: I thought they'd do bits, but their most famous bit?


 * : Hey, man, you're all right. How'd you like to be the new Chong?
 * Homer: Yes. Will I get to meet Dave?
 * : There is no Dave.
 * Homer: How about Don Johnson?
 * : It would be easier to meet Dave.


 * Seymour Skinner: A lot of people have cell phones, but I like to eat healthy, So I invented... the celery phone. Hello? Hello?
 * : Wow. You are the un-funniest man I've ever seen. Which means, teaming up with you would be totally pushing the envelope.
 * Seymour Skinner: Mother, how did you get this number? It's a prop phone. Yes, I have your celery. I took the limpest stalk there was.
 * : Stop it. Stop riffing. The gig is yours.