The Strong Arms of the Ma/Quotes

I'm here with actor Rainier Wolfcastle, who, surprisingly, has filed for bankruptcy. Rainier, what went wrong? Three divorces in three months. What can I say, Kent? I'm a romantic. But this personal tragedy translates into a good old fashioned bankruptcy sale! Yeah! Everything must go. Even the painting of my Nana. This was done on her wedding day. Or should I say "deading day".

Do you need some assistance picking over the tattered remains of my life? No, I'm good. Hey, your early porno movies! Are any of these hetero? What's there is there. - Do you think you could give me a lift home? Sure, I'll carry you in this giant Snuggli. I used it to carry Rob Schneider in the movie "My Baby Is An Ugly Man". Your heartbeat is so soothing. Shh. Time for sleep, little fatso.

Hello, Mrs. Homer! Apu, where's your bathroom? The bathroom is not for customers. Please use the crack house across the street. [gets whiff] Ugh, that is the most pungent thing I have ever smelled, and I am from India! All right, all right, but speak of this to no one!

Oh no! I pepper sprayed Ralph! Even my boogers are spicy!

Mom, you didn't get the milk. And you parked on top of the mailman. It's okay. All part of the job. Can you believe I get paid to wear short pants?

Ned, I'm not afraid! Well, aren't you a super-duper recouper. Grampa! I'm not afraid! Then you're not paying close enough attention!

Steroids aren't drugs. They occur naturally in the body, like sweat, or tumors.

Man, what am I smoking? Oh yeah, pot.

In second place: Marge Simpson! Second place!? Oh man, this'll just encourage her. I'm tired of her criticizing my saggy glutes. Quiet, her muscular ears can hear us.

Oh, I'm so proud of you, honey. You bulked up, but managed to keep your femininity. And that's why I didn't win! Sorry, sir, sorry. Starting tomorrow, I'm gonna up my glyco-load, use a denser ripping gel... Denser?! Damn straight, I didn't sacrifice my period for second place!