Bart and Lisa and Marge and Homer and Maggie (to a Lesser Extent) Vs. Thanksgiving/Quotes


 * Marge: You took the turkey out of the oven! How could you ear sixteen pounds of half-cooked poultry??
 * Homer: It was more like a fourth of the way cooked. But I wrapepd the pieces in salami so they'd go down easy.
 * Marge: Homer, what are we going to do for Thanksgiving dinner? Grampa. Selma, Patty, and my mother are comming over!
 * Homer: Not to mention my bar family. And Moe. Did I mention Moe?
 * Marge: Urrrrrrm...
 * Homer: I'm going to go get out of your hair and... ...drink. I'll be at Moe's.


 * Homer: Moe, you're giving thanks at Homer's? How could you do this to me??
 * Waylon Smithers: Simpson, I've been lookign all over for you!
 * Homer: Really?
 * Waylon Smithers: Well, no. We came here first. You file lists this bar as your home address. Homer, Mr. Burns needs your help. Get in. I suppose you want to know what this is all about.
 * Homer: Eh...
 * Waylon Smithers: It all started this morning...


 * Lisa: That's it! For once, I'm leaving! Give me Thanksgiving liberty or give me death!
 * Grampa: Whadapubub-aaaahh!
 * Lisa: Gaaaah!
 * Grampa: Lisa! You scared the teeth outta me!
 * Lisa: You wear dentures, Grampa.


 * Grampa: Uh-oh, Lisa. Looks like another angry mob out to kill your father. Guess we sould start begging for his life. Please don't kill my boy!
 * Lisa: Grampa, those people are family and friends.
 * Moe: We get here, no open's around, the door's bolted, the windows are locked, the flue is up on the chimney... listen, if this is some kinda Turkeyday joke, I ain't laughin'!
 * Lisa: Dad went to drink, and mom went to get a turkey!
 * Barney: Braaaaap! You don't have a turkey??
 * Bart: No turkey? But I promised these guys! I guess we can settle for a ham... ora turkey-flavored breakfast ceral of some kind.


 * Marge: Maggie, I said it before, and I'll say it again. Thanksgiving is about family being together.
 * Homer: Maaaarrge! The jello mold is losing it's structural integrity!
 * Marge: I'll be right in there. In forty five minutes. Or maybe a little longer