Now You Wiggum, Now You Don't!/Quotes


 * Clancy Wiggum: Here you go, Simpson. If you have any problems just call 911.
 * Homer: Oh right, were we still doing this?
 * Ralph: Hi, new daddy!
 * Homer: Um... so what do you do?
 * Ralph: At school I eat things for money.
 * Homer: Sweet.


 * Ralph: This show is scary! The boat talks!
 * Homer: It's all right. The talking boat just helps the police solve crimes.
 * Ralph: Police like my other daddy!
 * Bart: Homer's not your dad, Ralph. He's barely mine!


 * Homer:Time to wake up! It's the father and son picnic!
 * Bart: I told you I'm not going!
 * Homer: I wasn't talking to you!
 * Ralph: Oh, boy! Let's go!


 * Bart: Hey, Homer, I decided to be part of the dumb day after all!
 * Homer: Well, Ralph and I...
 * Bart: Meet my new dad!
 * Barney: Every day with this little one is a gift! Because he's paying me. Braaaap!
 * Homer: Barney?! What's the big idea?


 * Bart: Do you have any hamster food?
 * Lisa: here's still some in my pockets!
 * Bart: Give it here!
 * Ralph: Hi, Bart!
 * Bart: Hey, Ralph! I'm just going to throw this hamster food on you, okay?
 * Ralph: Sure!