Clown Therapy/Quotes


 * Krusty: ...then the pope says, "So what am I supposed to do with these watermelons?" Yuk-yuk-yuk-uhoo hoo hoo! Whaddya think? Too blue? Too sacrilegious?
 * Sideshow Mel: Change the pope to an elephant.
 * Krusty: That could work. Oh, these new network guidelines are giving me tsoris!
 * Mr. Teeny: Yeek! Yeek!
 * Krusty: What's this, Mr. Teeny? A subpoena?
 * Mr. Teeny: Yee-yee-yeeek!
 * Krusty: We're both named in the suit? Why did I ever give you power of attorney?


 * Bart: Now more Krusty? What will they run instead?
 * Lisa: "The She's all teh Grrlz."
 * Bart: Huh?
 * Lisa: Some middle-aged, children's programmer's idea of what tweenie girls want to see.


 * Krusty: Was that a joke, Mr. Smithers? Because I'm under a Doctor's orders not to laugh.
 * Waylon Smithers: Urm... [AHEM] More a play of words.
 * Lenny: Hey, it's Krusty!
 * Carl: Hey Krusty! Do something funny!
 * Krusty: Not today, gentleman.
 * Lenny: Darn clown thinks he's better than us.
 * Carl: I head he got hired under affirmative action.
 * Waylon Smithers: This is your work area.
 * Krusty: Nothing funny here. It's perfect.
 * Waylon Smithers: Well, I'll leave you to your number crunching.
 * Krusty: Hrmm...


 * Bart: Hi, Krusty. What's the haps?
 * Krusty: Aaaah!
 * Bart: Are you really giving up the clown life, Krusty?
 * Krusty: That's not me any more. I even changed my driver's license.
 * Bart: But we need you.
 * Krusty: What about me? I give and give and give! IT's never enough! Laughter' a drug, and I'm going cold turkey!
 * Bart: Man, you really aren't funny any more.


 * Mr. Burns: Krustofski! I understand your cool head and jocular raconteuring thwarted a panic.
 * Krusty: Err... if you say so, Nostradamus.
 * Mr. Burns: I'd like to offer you a promotion and a big fat raise.
 * Krusty: Thanks, but no thanks. I know here my place is. And if I ever forget, I only have to look into the smiling face of a child just like this one.
 * Bart: Aw.
 * Krusty: And if I still can't remember, I can look at this fat check to network sent to get me back! Turns out the "She's All That Grllz" weren't all that.
 * Mr. Burns: What a loss to the nuclear energy industry.
 * Bart: Your loos in mindless children's programming's gain.
 * Krusty: Yah ha ha ha ha ha!