A Tale of 2 Pen Pals/Quotes


 * Bart: Mom, are you sure Homer's Lisa's father?
 * Marge: Of course. What kind of question is that?
 * Bart: Then why are Lisa and I so different? I mean, It's not like I'm stupid or anything. But she thinks school is the greatest, and I wait for the three O'clock bell like... like a... a kid waiting for class to let out.
 * Marge: If the difference bothers you, then you could try to be more like her.
 * Bart: No way! I want her to be more like me!" Drop the bar a few feet! Stop making me look like family loser.


 * Ms. Hoover: Here is your assigned pen pal packet.
 * Lisa: Thank you, Miss Hoover.
 * Ms. Hoover: Remember this is a punishment. You are not to enjoy it.
 * Lisa: Yes, ma'am.


 * Lisa: I see you got your packet too, Bart.
 * Bart: So what?
 * Lisa: What country is your pen pal from?
 * Bart: None-of-your-beeswaxylavnia.
 * Milhouse: Is that near Turkey?


 * Homer: Is that homework, boy?
 * Bart: Sure is, dad. I'm writing to Khazgulah, my foreign pen pal. I'm telling him what I ded in school today.
 * Homer: I had a foreign pen pal when I was a boy.
 * Bart: What country was he from?
 * Homer: Michigan. What a different world they live in.


 * Lisa: Wait a minute... you said your pen pal is from Zszsbec!
 * Bart: I did?
 * Lisa: That's the village across the river from Salucca's
 * Bart: What a co-winkydinik, huh?
 * Lisa: You and disaster are never a co-winkydink, Bart. Show me your letter!
 * Bart: Um... maybe later, okay?
 * Lisa: I knew it!
 * Bart: Mom!