Stealing First Base/Quotes

Bart: I'm sorry!

Nikki: Ugh! You're always apologizing.

Nikki: What do you mean about 'us'?

Bart : Well, like, uh, aren't you my girlfriend now?

Bart: I'm not gonna let you hurt me anymore.

Skinner: Any physical contact violates our school's no-touch policy.

Skinner: I prefer dead child to a lawsuit from your parents.

Kevin: Let's me touch your face. That's way, I can see you with my finger. Eww! I said your face, not your butt!

Bart: You're hot, You're cool. What is your deal?!

Nikki: Bart, you have some things to learn about women.


 * [shuts locker door]

Nikki: And I'll never tell you what they are.

Skinner: So the lesson is children-

Michelle Obama: I'll tell them what the lesson is.

Chalmers: He's our Joe Biden.

Michelle Obama: Understood.


 * [Homer and Marge enter Skinners office where two people in suit are waiting]

Skinner: Marge, homer, this is Brody and Madison McKenna. Bart has been sharing a desk with their daughter, Nikki.

Madison: Earlier today, your son engaged in inappropriate mouth-on-mouth contact with our daughter.

Marge: You mean, he kissed her?

Brody: On the top of the slide.

Homer: That's all that happened? And I got to miss work?! Oh, I could kiss you.

Madison: Mr. Simpson, I'm an attorney, and my husband is a federal prosecutor, And neither of us is happy.

Homer: Well, maybe you guys should look for easier jobs.

Madison: Unless you make this an affection-free environment, We will sue this school for its last dime.

Skinner: All right, here it is.

Madison: And we will make you regret the day your son was born.

Homer: You're halfway home, lady.