The Last King of Spotland/Quotes


 * Seymour Skinner: Bart Simpson!
 * Bart: Principal Skinner, I think you have bit of cheese right here!
 * Seymour Skinner: How did you gain access to my bedroom?
 * Bart: I'm not saying anything, but if I did, I might have had some help.
 * Agnes Skinner: This is payback for using the guest towels in the bathroom!
 * Seymour Skinner: That's my private bathroom, mother!
 * Agnes Skinner: Which means you're not a guest!
 * Seymour Skinner: Bart Simpson, for years I've tried to appeal to your conscience. I realize now that's a waste of time. So I'm giving you a new conscience.
 * Ralph: Hi, Bart! It's me, Ralph! We go to school togheter!
 * Bart: What?
 * Seymour Skinner: Ralph will be your constant companion. He's the most innocent child at this school, and I'm hoping you'll learn from him!
 * Ralph: My macaroni and cheese tastes like principal Skim milk.
 * Seymour Skinner: Bart, meet your personal Jiminy Cricket!
 * Ralph: Ha! I'm a cricket! [CHIRP!] [CHIRP!]
 * Bart: [SIGH!]


 * Marge: It's time to go to the opera! Oh no! Chocolate, red wine, and mud stains?
 * Homer: I got hungry and thirsty and bored!
 * Marge: Well, no worries with Marge's spot away! It'll even celean the Springfield slob! There! All ready to go to the opera.
 * Homer: That's the thing were women box in bikins, right?
 * Marge: Take it from Mrs. Spot Way, it'll make stains go away!


 * Marge: Hello, Lindsey! We're here to do the new commercial! Someone forgot to print up a script for me though!
 * Lindsey: Hello, Marge! The invenstors have decided to go a different direciton with the live ad campaign. Homer, meet your new co-star, Ms. Spot Away!
 * Ms. Spot Away: Hiya, handsome! [GIGGLE!]
 * Marge: I don't understand.
 * Lindsey: People are used to seeing fat slobs on television with young, sexy women. It just makes people more comfortable, especially over-weight slobs.
 * Marge: Well, I don't approve of this at all! Homer, let's go home!
 * Lindsey: Your signature on this contract says you approve of everything we decide to do! Also, if HOmer doesn't do the commercials, we'll sue!


 * Ralph: Hi, Bart! Do you like haircut? Mr barber calls it "The Ralph!"
 * Bart: Listen, Ralph, you win! If Homer taught me anything, it's knowing when to give up!
 * Ralph: Yay! I win! Okay, now it's your turn!
 * Bart: What do you mean?
 * Ralph: You did the things I told you to now I'll something you tell me to! It's only fair!
 * Bart: Really?


 * Ralph: Your daddy looks sad.
 * Bart: I know but what can we do? We're just kids! That's it! We're kids!