Ned 'n' Edna's Blend Agenda/Quotes


 * Lisa: First of all, congratulations on getting the lead.
 * Homer: Whee! Whee!
 * Lisa: I just hope you're going to take this seriously.
 * Homer: Oh, yes, Lisa. Very seriously. Whee!
 * Lisa: Dad, the story of the Passion is the cornerstone of the Christian faith. And although I personally follow the enlightened teachings of Lord Buddha, messing with Jesus really gets people mad. It's like wearing a Florida State jersey to a Florida game.
 * Homer: O Lord, why have you placed this fearsome burden on my shoulders?
 * Lisa: It'll be fine. Just learn your lines.
 * Homer: Does Jesus have a big part in this thing?
 * Lisa: He's in every scene.
 * Homer: What? Why do I succeed at everything I audition for?


 * Ned: You pulled the boys out of school?
 * Edna: Ned, I know I should have consulted you, but that school is beneath them. Take my word as a teacher of 15 years.
 * Ned: Well, sir, when we got married, I knew I'd find some spices in my chili. I guess they can go to Springfield Hellementary.
 * Edna: Oh!
 * Ned: Mm-hmm.


 * Marge: Congratulations, you two! We're so, so happy for you.
 * Homer: Welcome to marriage. Another good man bites the dust.


 * Bart: Yo, Homer, Mom says get your fat ass over to the Flanders'.
 * Homer: Bart! Don't call me that!
 * Bart: Which one? "Homer" or "fat ass"?
 * Homer: Why, you little... They're both bad, and I suspect you know it!
 * Bart: Get your hands off of me, you fat ass!


 * Ned: You get my boys tattoos, you change their school, you buy Rod sneakers that light up like Times Square. Shoes are shoes and lights are lights. Now just when do I get a say in how my boys are raised?! This marriage isn't perfect!