Home Sweet Homediddly-Dum-Doodily

"Home Sweet Homediddly-Dum-Doodily" is the third episode of season 7 and aired on October 1, 1995. The episode was written by Jon Vitti and directed by Susie Dietter. Joan Kenley guest stars.

Plot
Homer gives Marge a surprise trip to a relaxation center, abandoning the children under the ineffective care of Grampa. Meanwhile, Bart has gotten lice from Milhouse's monkey, forcing him to have his clothes burned at school. Lisa has had her prescription shoes stolen by bullies. They come home wearing bags, finding their parents are not home and the child welfare agency (prompted by Principal Skinner) has taken offense at the poor conditions of the house (the household chores were simply postponed, but the agency misinterprets such signals as a stack of 20-year-old newspapers obtained for Lisa's history project). Homer and Marge arrive just as the agents take Bart, Lisa, and Maggie, convinced Marge and Homer are bad parents.

The Simpson kids are taken to a foster home - right next door, at the house of Ned Flanders. The kids have to get used to Flanders' style nachos (cucumbers with cottage cheese), bedtime when there's still light, and hours of Bible Bombardment. Bart and Lisa hate it, but Maggie enjoys being there and seems willing to remain, apparently because Ned pays her more attention than Homer did. When Ned finds out that none of the Simpsons were baptized, he faints and takes it upon himself to give the kids a proper baptism.

Meanwhile, as there is no way for Homer and Marge to talk to their children, even by phone, they take classes to become better parents as they are forced to attend a basic class on home care, including such lessons as putting garbage into garbage cans, and leaving milk either in a refrigerator or a cool, wet sack. Marge is genuinely humiliated, while Homer seems to have learnt a lot. In the end they are declared fit parents. When they go to pick up the kids, they see only a note saying "Gone Baptizin'". They quickly head for the Springfield River, where Ned is about to baptize Bart. Homer arrives at the scene just as Flanders is about to sprinkle holy water over Bart's head. Homer pulls Bart over and the holy water falls upon Homer's head instead, apparently burning him. He has a moment of grace after his baptism but quickly reverts back to his old self and angrily reclaims his kids from the Flanders. Maggie wavers between staying with the Flanders and returning home, only deciding when Marge shows up and calls to her. They head home together, mocking the old paint cans in Ned's garage.

Home Sweet Homediddly-Dum-Doodily