The Flunky!/Quotes


 * Homer: Today was the worst day of my life.
 * Marge: I thought the worst day of your life was when you threw up on the Japanese prime minster.
 * Homer: Today was worse.
 * Marge: He're a beer with a nipple and the remotre. Your favorite show, "Oaf and Wifey" is coming on.
 * Homer: "Oaf and Wifey"? Great! A show about a stupid, bumbling, morbidly obese, blue collar oaf and his sweet, understanding wife that's smarter then him will help me forget my own life.


 * Mr. Burns: You're responsible for this!
 * Homer: Why? Beacuse I caused the meltown? Because I suggested the boycott? Beacuse I gave the newspaper an excluse tell-all interview?
 * Waylon Smithers: Leave now.
 * Mr. Burns: You're terminated.
 * Homer: Eh, I'll be back. I'm always back.


 * Homer: Family, the answers to our prayers have been answered! Reality television, the television that has given us so much, is going to get me a new job! I'm going to be... The Flunky!
 * Marge: I just read a bilboard about that. Isn't "The Flunky" a competition to find Monty Burn's successor?
 * Homer: Uh-huh.
 * Marge: And didn't Mr. Burns just fire you?
 * Homer: What's your point?
 * Marge: I just don't see him making you a candidate to be head of the power plant.
 * Lisa: I don't know, mom. If history has taught us anything, it's that Mr. Burns has a bottomless well of forgiveness for dad.
 * Homer: Then I'm a shoe-in!


 * Mr. Burns: Well that's that. I believe I have a commercial shoot scheduled for the new burnscard, the card that charges twice the interest, but has my face on it!
 * Waylon Smithers: Sir, you've just whittled the candidate pool down to the final two! Either Carl Carlson or Homer Simpson will be... ...The Flunky!
 * Mr. Burns: There's no need to scream, Smithers.
 * Waylon Smithers: I thought you'd be excited.
 * Mr. Burns: About what?
 * Waylon Smithers: The climax of your television show, sir. YOu need to work up a little enthusisam if you're going to hit the talk show circuit and plug the finale.
 * Mr. Burns: Talk shows?


 * Mr. Burns: Simpson, congratultions. Welcome to your new office as head of the Springfield Nuclear Power Plant.
 * Homer: Didn't that van take us to Shelbyville?
 * Waylon Smithers: And that elevator took you half a kilometer underground, to this bunker, devoid of any connection to the plant. But it still doesn't change the fact that you're in charge. Settle in, watch some tv, and we'll be back around five.
 * Homer: Yeah, yeah, do what you gotta do.