Grampa Flanders/Quotes


 * Ned: Well, as the baby lamb said to the horse, "why the long face?"
 * Grampa: My family'd rather go to the picture show than be with me on my birthday.
 * Ned: Well sir, that's just no right. We're supposed to honor our fathers and monthers!
 * Grampa: I wish someone would put that in writing.


 * Bart: Pass, the milk, old man!
 * Homer: What the--? Old man?!
 * Bart: Now that Grampa's joined the Flanders clan, that makes you the oldest one in the family!
 * Homer: That doesn't mean I'm and old--


 * Mr. Burns: So to make a long story short...
 * Bart: Too late!
 * Mr. Burns: ...my lawyer plea bargained the wsetence down to one million hours of community service. Being a foster grandfather falls under the community service category, and so here I am at your disposal! So what do you say? Will you let me be your family's new Grampa?
 * Homer: Gee, Mr. Burns, to be honest you scare and intimidate me!
 * Mr. Burns: So I'm like a father figure to you already! Huzzah! I'll take that as a yes!


 * Bart & Lisa: Mr. Burns! Mr. Burns!
 * Mr. Burns: Tut tut! It's Grampa Burns!
 * Bart: You were right! I did an amazing prank and got away with it!
 * Mr. Burns: Excellent!
 * Lisa: And I got an A+ on a pop quiz!
 * Mr. Burns: Excellent plus! Come with me, won't you children?
 * Bart: Well, I guess it's okay to get a ride with you.
 * Lisa: I mean you are texhnically our grandfather.


 * Homer: There we go! The perfect Grampa trap!
 * Bart: What's in this thing?
 * Homer: Ribbon candy, copies of National Geographic, and a picture of an adorable grandchild. Lisa, can you hide and play some old man music?
 * Lisa: I think I can swing something Benny Goodman-ish!
 * Bart: No Grandparent could resist all that, and then we'll have our family back! You'er like a cross between Dr. Hpil and a James Bond villian!