Treehouse of Horror XIV/Quotes


 * [Lisa asking about Frink, Sr. when she first sees him.]

Did a shark do that? Yes. He was testing out a new blood-based sun-tan lotion.


 * [Hanging from a noose.]

If I knew this would take so long I'd put out a TV.
 * [Pizza boy comes in.]

Pizza! The money's on the counter… No tip. Aw, you miserable bastard! That's why I'm up here. [looks at his watch again]

Death! Death! We miss you so much! You were a busboy in the restaurant of life. Clearing away the oldies and the sickies and the junkies. And you made racing exciting!

Dad! You've become the new Grim Reaper! No way, forget it. I might occasionally kill out of anger, or to illustrate a point. But I am not a Grim Reaper! [the robe sucks in his groin] Ow! Ow! I'll reap! I'll reap already!

I'm getting me a real spleen and then I'm gonna vent it on you boy chick.


 * [To Seymour, after Frink Sr. ripped out his spine.]

Lost your spine, huh? You just keep finding new ways to disappoint me.

Do you realize what this means? Yeah, but you say it first.

Wait! When people see all the stuff we did, they're gonna kill us! Yeah… and I can't run too fast after 15 years of eating nothing but Gummi Worms. [swallows a bunch of Gummi Worms] I'm gonna quit tomorrow, I swear.

Why can't I tinker with the fabric of existence? Let the baby have her bottle.