The Haw-Hawed Couple/Quotes


 * Lisa: Mom, Bart's drinking
 * Bart: It's not coffee, it's hot Pepsi!


 * Homer: They killed Graystache!
 * Guy: Thanks for the spoiler, big mouth! [throws the book at Homer]


 * [Bart is staring at Nelson's vest in care, when Nelson rides by on his bike.]
 * Nelson: Ha-ha! I touched your heart!


 * Milhouse: Trust me Bart, it's better to walk in on both your parents than on just one of them.


 * Marge: Bartholomew J. Simpson! How can you be so mean?
 * Bart: What can you do about it? [Marge whacks him on the head with a spoon] Hey!
 * Marge: I'll whack you with the whole salad set if you don't start thinking about others!


 * Homer: [tucking Lisa into bed] Okay. Tucked in tight, glass of water, night light on, no barn owls, don't do drugs, love you, good night!


 * Bart: Where is Nelson?
 * Principal Skinner: I'm sorry. Nelson never woke up.
 * Bart: What?!
 * Principal Skinner: Never woke up because he never passed out...he's right over there.


 * Homer: No man should have to out live his fictional wizard! [sobs]


 * Martin: Individually we are weak, like a single twig. But as a bundle, we form a mighty faggot.
 * Bart: Well said!
 * [After Martin's line, a title appears: fag•got (fag´• et) n. a bundle of sticks for fuel. (Fr. fagot, a bundle of sticks)]


 * Homer: Time to do what I do best: Lie to a child.