Merchants of Vengeance!/Quotes


 * Homer: A bag of pork rinds, Apu, my good man!
 * Apu: Here you are, Mr. Homer, sir! That will be $400 I take it by the tex avery-style unhinging of you jaw that you are surprised by our new prices. I am afraid shoplifting has caused me to go from simple gouging to a super ulta-gouge.


 * Comic Book Guy: The are now a league of extra-ordinary gentlmen fighting for truth, justice, and the capitalist way! We need a catchy name to convey fear and respect! I propose "The Merchants of Vengeance!"
 * Ned: That's a tad too violent for my tastes. And vengeance is already someone else's department. How about Justice for Jesus?
 * Apu: Um... no! Anti-punk patrol!
 * Ned: The Holy Helpers!
 * Comic Book Guy: Captain Comic Book and his all-star shopkeepers!


 * Comic Book Guy: I think you find the comics you attempted to seal were pre-treated to deliver then times more papers cuts then the leading brand!
 * Kearney: Aaah!
 * Nelson: Gah!
 * Comic Book Guy: Now, are you going to turn yourselves over to the prope authorities, or do I have to bring out... ...the lemon juice!?
 * Kearney: Aaah! No man! Put that thing away!
 * Nelson: Well'll go to the cops right now! See, watch us go!


 * Bart: Man, the bus sure is empty today.
 * Lisa: Everyone's been arrested for shoplifting. It doesn't make sense. Dolph, Nelson, Kearney I can see... but Milhouse? Martin? Sherri and Terri?
 * Bart: Well, Terri I can see. She's the evil twin, right?
 * Lisa: Something's going on, Bart.
 * Bart: Aw, you're just being paranoid.
 * Lisa: I hope so.


 * Bart: Lisa, I don't want to get you in trouble, too. I'm gonna turn myself in.
 * Lisa: Okay!
 * Bart: Okay? You'd let me turn myself in? Don't you know a bluff when you hear one? Now help me!
 * Lisa: Okay, okay! Let's go back to the scne of the crime and look for clues.